shrill voices

Monica Oh My Darling

2012-01-15T21:00:00.003+05:30

So how many of us turn to the Sitcom Friends for respite.

If there is one series that will be talked about like Leonardo Da Vinci’s MonaLisa in ages to come It has to be Friends.

I request the script writers Marta Kauffman and David Crane to write it out in a papyrus and put it in vacuum bottles and throw them in sea, send them on moon and rest thrown away at Paris.(near the tombs of hot models;people are bound to find it)Though my favourite character is Phoebe Buffet but if I can totally connect with someone in Friends it is Monica.

Oh yes we were both overweight when in school.Monica had earned the epithet of “Big Fat Goalie”. Remember when Ross(Monica’s brother) reveals that she caused their parents' porch swing to break; it had been previously thought that a hurricane had broken it. Ross tells that after being sent to bed without dinner one night, Monica tried to eat the macaroni glued to her jewelry box. I remember as a child when I resembled what even my teacher called "baby elephant" ,my cousin got me sweets and I jumped out of joy at the sight to break a bed .At night when my parents would go off to sleep I would sneak and steal cookies and cakes.

Oh yes I want my place spick and span.The first thing that came to my mind when I shifted to my own apartment was no TV,no sofa but a vacuum cleaner. Monica calls her dry cleaner her Disneyland.

Oh yes I like elderly brawny men(read: Arjun Rampal) just as she likes Richard.

Oh yes I have always believed in the Japanese 5s methodology and so does Monica. She categorizes towels into 11 sections, examples being "everyday use," "fancy," "guest," and "fancy guest."I do that in 5. Masalas labelled in my kitchen just as Monica has her spoons labelled.To know more about 5s method

Oh yes I am a workout freak and like Monica I have coaxed quite a lot of friends to try it out. Here too most of our friends have not matched our standards and both Mon and I have given up on our friends.

Oh yes I am damn careful about the money I spend.I am too good at bargaining and hate to be duped. “I KNOW” is my favourite catchphrase too.

I love my possessions and hate losing them to anybody just as Monica. Remember how she refuses to lend any of her ear rings to Rachel because she misplaces them always. I am very smart in asking my possessions back when I’ve lent it. I have always been like that.In class 5 when we had to frame a sentence on idioms.

A friend of mine wrote this . Shrill can be a bear with a sore head,if you take away her notebook and don’t return it back to her.

Oh yes I am hyper excited most of the times and voice can be shrill and piercing as Mon’s.I love to treat friends with my delicacies and playing a host and how dare they say I am bad at it.

We both have a stickler for time. When Monica becomes Phoebe's wedding planner, she orders the events run on "military time". I always would reach class at time in college and only later would I come to know that it was supposed to be bunked.

By now you must have realised how self obsessed the two of us are. I will scribble my name in every book and writing pad. Recently I was so self engrossed that I addressed “Dear Sneha” on a beautiful card we got to gift a friend.

Quirks and idiosyncrasies are what make people interesting.

Thanks to all my friends for accepting me the way I am !!

I’ll be there for you....

P.S "I KNOW" Its not Archies Friendship’s day today.

Millionaire and Slumdog

2011-11-01T23:32:00.004+05:30

“Shrill why do you have to think so much.Get a life!!”
Seriously that’s what many friends tell me but I would agree with Sheldon(from Big Bang theory) and Einstein. I fail to understand why should I not be using that 1.2 kgs of gray matter which is so underutilsed in all of us. Only 10% in an average human being .
So here I ruminate.
         When I see little kids selling diyas on the eve of Diwali I am forced to think “What a paradox!!” I am in a country where even the poorest of the poors worship the Goddess of Wealth Lakshmi on the eve of diwali and yearn for fortune..Is God listening?
I wont rattle out the figures of economic disparity in India which is are at an all time high.Stats are here.No wonder this week newspaper columns have been writing
so much on whether the ostentatious,luxurious and some like Mr.Mani Shankar Aiyar who have been calling it “vulgar” expenditure that cannot be justified in the form of Formula one races. As Mr. Shankar and the like minded put it, there is a greater India that needs that amount of money just to be alive while the rich indulge in their entertainment. Right or not I wont remark as my last post was on the futility of debates…But the fact that each time we see a poor child begging..aren’t we not filled with a bit of guilt? God..what have I done to deserve this good a life?
Inherently we all like to see,read and tell our kids success stories where people have carved their niche, out of their sheer mettle.We all get that inner joy when we see someone going from rags to riches.If we are rich we will be infused with sympathy..If we are poor we will have a certain degree of empathy.
So as the nation exults in the victory of Mr. Sushil Kumar winning 5 crores, I have penned down a few lines in hindi keeping in mind the last 7 days.
 समय तो एक ही है,भगवान भी एक ही है
 पर कहीं एक तरफ दीवाली है तो दूसरी तरफ दीवाला है..
 पूजा के मन्त्र भी एक ही हैं,विधि भी एक ही है..
 पर कहीं एक तरफ सोने की लक्ष्मी है, तो दूसरी तरफ दिया भी नही जल पाया है..
 दिन भी वही है,दिनांक भी वही है
 पर कही एक तरफ घी के हज़ार लड्डू हैं,तो दूसरी तरफ बताशा भी ना चढ़ पाया है..
 देश भी एक ही है..दुनिया भी एक ही है
 पर कहीं F1 देखा जाता है..,तो दूसरी तरफ दूरदर्शन भी नही आता है..
. संख्या भी एक ही है और सत्ता भी एक ही है
.. पर कहीं 5 करोड़ बस हाथो की मैल है..तो कहीं KBC ही एक आशा है...
 समय तो एक ही है,भगवान भी एक ही है
 पर कहीं भाग्य विधाता है और कहीं भाग्य विदा हो जाता है...

FOOT IN MOUTH

2011-10-20T22:30:00.001+05:30

Ihad a splitting headache today and had to pop a crocin...

Nono..and definitely not the perennial tantrums of my Boss

Butbecause of a hell raising debate...

Ireally believe I’ll be a very good spouse because of my apathy towards debatesand arguments..and I realised at the end of the splitting debate..err..headache that I definitely will never be able to make in to even the localpanchayat forget Lok sabha and the rest..

The topic though was a trivial one; at the endwhen the sweet arbitrator tried to putus to ceasefire and when we,the great debaters who are otherwise good friends,realisedthat we had whiled away an hour;we both decided to shut up!!

So,haveyou ever seen a happy end of a debate?

Icant recollect one such example except those debate competitions in schoolwhere one holds up a trophy!

Frankly I feel all those years in school wherestudents are encouraged to take part in debates (pointless again is the entireconcept where kids are given a topic,asked to write or get it written,mug upthe content and deliver it from their memory in front of a naive audience) goesdown in drain..

Theysay debate is an intellectual pursuit..but how?

Atthe end of 99% of debates both the parties are left unconvinced and not an iotado they agree with each other.

Humanbeings are supposed to be opinionated and possess the thing called “ego” which doesn’t feel good when bruised.

Inmy observation,the more “intellectual” a person claims or is renowned to be,the more opinions he has of his own,and the less likely he is to be budgedfrom his ground of thinking because he has ultimate assurance,confidence and attimes even pride in his “intellect”.

Lookat the those correspondents on TV talk shows trying to put debaters to peace whenthey start screaming at each other on screen .Thefutile debates in the parliaments and unnecessary interruptions and delays costso much to our exchequer.

Hailingfrom an engineering college where we get enough of time for discussions and“bakar” I remember a few incidents.

Duringcollege some of my guy friends had a debate over the complexion of Sunidhi Chauhanand Shreya Ghoshal as to which of the 2 singers is fairer..

Toprove, both started downloading images on google and trying to prove their point .

Result:An entire night wasted with no conclusions.(Not that even reaching a conclusionon this one would make a huge difference to anyone)

Somesimilar ones are

Whois the better khan Aamir or Shah Rukh?

Whois the more beautiful of the two?

Aishwaryaor Sushmita?

Whatis better ?

Asmart and not-so beautiful wife or a not-so smart but beautiful wife?

Whichis innocuous Halal meat or Jhatka?

Whatis healthier?

Vegfood or non veg?

MBAas a career option or not?

Lifein big cities or Life in small ones?

Ahh..andthose debates men so often get embroiled and start quoting facts and figuresjust to prove who is greater of them.

SirDon Bradman or Sachin Tendulkar?

Peleor Maradona?

Federeror Nadal?

Andsuddenly some one will quote a statistic and the other party will disagree andbet and go google just to prove him wrong..but damn that still doesn’t end thedebate..

Letit just be guys ..There have been issues and debates unresolved since timeimmemorial..Most of the times I feel the debaters just end up wasting theirtime and energy.

Likethe UN debates of Palestine Vs Israel.

IndiaVs Pakistan

CommunismVs Democracy

Industrial Development Vs Eco-system sustainability

GodVs Science

Ifthere is any little benefit out of a debate then it goes to those who are thesilent neutral observers,who listen to it with an open mind and seek someknowledge from both the sides . Its like two dogs strive for a bone and thethird one runs off with it.But very soon this third dog meets another one andstarts fighting as he soon has his own opinion too.

So how right is it for you to vent your spleenover a statement you believe in?How right is it for you to engage in a debate?

Debate sure promises a repartee and as moviesshow even helps forge relationships but I have decided for the umpteenth timeto shut up and never engage in one.So what if people think I am dumb and toopacific! After all its my own opinion. So you don’t want to debate on the “FUTILITY OF DEBATE” .Do you?

I WISH I COULD BE YOU..LAILA!!

2011-07-17T18:34:00.000+05:30

I finally came out of my Cine-Bad luck record..Paisa Vasooled after a long time..

I was in Kolkata on company business and got time post work to catch a movie

Zindagi Milegi Na Dobara was a totally refreshing movie..It was much like a Lonely Planet show..Spanish tourism is bound to get a boost.

Another reason why I probably am singing in praise is because I was able to establish a connect with Laila(played with Katrina) before you Kat Fans get offended I am aware Katrina is light years away from any girl next door in terms of pulchritude.

No I am not a deep sea diver like Laila.. rather I just have had the practice of swimming ..I fear the deep end. Laila talks about what she wants from life

“Meeting new people and experiencing new at every point in life”

That sounded so much like a soliloquy to me.

I ‘ve so wanted to see the country and the world..and I don’t have a problem doing it alone..
But there are things to stop me in this pursuit!

As I was going to bed ruminating about this…. I got an sms from an official acquaintance who asked me if I was okay in and if I had heard any rumour..Not very pleasantly, I replied that I was not in town and I didn’t pick up any rumour hints at midnight.The next morning I’m woken up by another phone call..This time from my aunty in Ranchi..she asked me the same question “If I had heard the news going around?”

Now what rumour/news had been floating around that I was oblivious of?? And this is what I heard “A female employee of my Company was raped at the very scenic Dimna Dam while she was visiting the place in the company of a male friend” Since there are not many female employees in the manufacturing sector I could understand their concern….

Like each time I read about such cases..I was irked,aghasted,repelled by this heinous act..I’d been disturbed all day long.After day long of engagements I returned to the Hotel it was 8.30 pm.I had to buy a gift for a dear friend.I googled nearest Titan showroom. I decided to put myself to a small test and set out on foot all alone based on the random google maps . I made a quick circle from ho chi minh sarani that was deserted .The showroom had its shutters half down and was about to close in the camac street.Struck by hunger I went out to hunt for street food on the notorious Park street on a Saturday night and its nearby lanes at nine at night.I wanted to pack food at a roll corner but I had become aware of a group of guys who were staring so I ditched the idea.

I returned back safe! A short celebration of liberation!

But the morning thought had still been haunting me…Are such perpetrators worse than savages?

I’m sure even animal kingdom has respectable protocols..and so do “uncivilized” tribes in Africa

And worse what aftermath does the female go after she has undergone something as ravaging as a rape.

The entire question of “why me?” or worse

“God! Why did you make me a weaker gender?”

Paradoxically In a country where Durga,Lakshmi and Saraswati are worshipped..I know people will call it a feminist’s question but isn’t this a humanitarian one?

Why do they do it?What do they get out of it?and you know what “they” does not include a minuscule percentage population?The National Crime Records Bureau state that in the year 2009 a total of 21091 rape cases were reported in police station.Officially every 30 minutes a woman is raped.Adding to that Medical Counselors say that only 1 in 69 cases are reported.So you can well imagine the number of females who are so devastated and don’t want to go through the stigma of being asked “disgraceful questions” by police and medical examinations just to prove what they have gone through.

Thinking and cringing at it;I read a Nielsen report revealed that Indian women are the most stressed out in the world: 87% of our women feel stressed out most of the time.. Even in workaholic America, only 53% women feel stressed.There’s not a single day when we girls are not reminded of our helplessness..

If I take an auto the guy sitting or uncle sitting next to me will try to nudge me..

If I am travelling in a bus the “bhaiya” needs to be reminded to make some space and not to make contact..

If I’m travelling by train..God! help me if I’m alone be it AC..General class..I’ll have all the eyeballs on me..staring at me as if I were some alien..Here’s a fact most of us wont sleep in train at night lest the man sleeping on the next berth tries to lay his hand on us..Many a times no one will come to rescue even If you’ll try..and Please don’t ask us to report to the police waala 50% times even he might be eyeing us with uncouth eyes..If you’re walking on streets comments will pass once or twice..Again if the situation is really bad some one will just come on his bike and make sure he gets the thrill of scaring a girl out of her wits by touching her..and before you will have come out of the shock and have had the sense of noting his number down he’ll be gone in a jiffy.

Workplace too might not always be a friendly place.In a recent poll it was found that 60% of working women have faced sexual harassment at some point of time in their working lives.

Coming to the point,I cannot take a knapsack on my back and cannot put on my khaki shorts and go about camping in some field or exploring some mountain alone by myself.. Laila(Katrina) seized the day and lived every moment to the fullest beause she was in Spain and not in India and probably was the daughter of a well to do man..I cannot seize the day..I cannot impress Hrithik Roshan by my free spirit..I cannot live the way I want to because there might be some villain lurking out there..

I HATE LOVE STORIES

2011-04-19T21:50:00.005+05:30

He used to sit there at my newly launched “Chai bar” very often….
Clad in kurta and jeans he used to frequent my Tea shop every Sunday..
It had been almost half a year and he hadn’t missed even a single sunday..He generally used to be there alone with his only company being a book and a cup of tea..and used to sit there for a couple of hours..
It had been a dream come true for me launching a tea bar chain of my own..I used to make sure that I was present at this Manor Road joint every Sunday
He was tall,sultry and spectacled…(just my kinda guy)
Somewhere in mid thirties meaning only about a couple of years elder to me..I was happy with life but Ma always had been hinting that my free single independent life needs a “suitable man”….and each time I saw him I thought the same..
The first 4 weeks I remember he’d only order “Assam Special” and consume it copiously..
He used to come to the counter and rattle his order straight away..I suggested him once “why don’t you try something else as well? Oolong is good too”
He gave me a look of surprise that seemed to say “ you seem to be following my orders lady?”
Ahhh..how I wish I could follow them
He readily acceded and said “ok,ill try it..” and flashed his smile..
I understood what “being swept off one’s feet meant”
I always wanted to talk to him..find out what book was he was reading?
Once when he came to order “oolong” at the counter I furthered our conversation by saying “Oh yes Oolong will just go perfectly well with your current read”
Isnt that book about Roald Amundsen’s adventure at the south pole?
He had said “so miss,It seems you do more than just selling tea”
I sprang at that opportunity and boasted him about my B-school stint and entrepreneurship plans..I wanted to know about his pursuit as well..no it wouldn’t matter…if he were just a struggling writer or journo..
We would have married and I would be happy selling tea ever after and just see him stay occupied with his book and my hand made tea….
I was just about to ask him his pursuit when I was accosted by another customer at the counter..
For once I didn’t want to do business..
There were so many pretty girls and women frequenting my “chai bar” but he never ever raised his eyes to even take a glimpse of them…forget ogling …much to my relief.
The only habit I found a bit disconcerting was when he stepped out to smoke..but I would make him quit that too someday..
At times he used to bring a laptop ..I would watch those tough,muscular hands in motion..working fast on the keyboard..I would generally make myself conspicuous and try to grab his attention by being extra polite and courteous to other customers..…Once I had brought my 3 yr old niece along..and I remember how he had offered her a chocolate out of his pocket when he’d come to order “Oolong”
Somehow his reticent and tough yet gentle demeanour never allowed me to open up very freely to him..besides it would be partial and unethical as a shop-owner to give extra attention to one customer…most importantly it would let loose a babble of tongues..
And one day…
It was raining really wildly that day..I stuck to my routine..and by 11 was there at my counter…
The clock struck 11:30 and he wasn’t there…since the weather had turned stormy and rainy a few customers chugged in cars and stopped in for tea but I didn’t receive their orders with alacrity..
I was distracted..and slowly was getting disappointed..
No..how could I stay without seeing him for the rest of the week?
Had he come today I definitely would start my discussions on the book he was reading last week..
Not only had I bought the book but did extra research on it…to impress him… and wore my best black salwar suit for that slim look with perfect matching jewellery…
Despondent I exited from my Manor Road “chai bar”..since It was raining I grabbed the other day’s newspaper to provide that mobile shed and ward off the rain..I sat in my car and left then newspaper on the dashboard.I was about to start the car when I saw the newspaper… That page had a news I never wanted to believe “ Ranchi:August 15,2017 The Jan Lokpal finds Mr. Ajay Kishore guilty of misappropriation funds worth Rs. 10 crores.”Above this news piece was his picture.That was how I came to know him

I came ..I saw ..They conquered..

2011-04-03T23:15:00.006+05:30

As the entire nation has been painted in the euphoria of the Indian Cricket team winning and bringing the "Cup that counts" home and as the media is fully catching up with this well deserved long awaited frenzy..I decided why not do the same...
I know there are some thousands blogs sprouting simultaneously on the same subject..
All this a catharsis to yesterday’s victory....
I am frankly no big cricket follower..i know nothing about IPL(and frankly don’t want to)
I give a damn to any match going on that doesn’t involve my country.
I am what as guys would love to describe “a typical Indian girl” who still has difficulty understanding inside edge,long on,mid off,slip,silly gully and all those stuffs..
I am just one of those nondescript persons in the crowd who want their country to win..
And definitely win against Pakistan...I admire Sachin Tendulkar as any one in the country for his amazing brilliance with the bat and the utter humble conduct
And yes I take great pride like any other Ranchiite
“ hey you know what Dhoni is my neighbour and we studied in the same school”
I am like thousands out there who will either wear the same coloured T they wore last time because India won...will eat the same food in between the breaks because India won the last time they practised that..and definitely will or will not sit in front of the TV set when their favourite team is batting..In my case its a bit extreme..I believe my presence is cursed and so I don’t watch my country batting..So,It happened in the Finals yesterday..sitting at the edge of my chair on the computer refreshing score card on cric info and listening to the cheers and despondent sighs of folks watching the match outside.
Last few balls when India seemed destined to win I came ..I saw and they conquered..
It was then that I experienced the euphoria and rejoiced the moment..
It was great listening to Kumara Sangakkara’s eloquent speech after which I was told that he is a law student himself..no wonder..where all that acumen and words flow..
Another great point to note was apna Dhoni’s speech he said "had we lost out I would have been asked why sreesanth not ashwin?yuvraj singh why not at number 4 despite his form ..there are plenty of questions?” and when asked about his run bank he said
“I had a point to prove not to others but to myself..”
That is what makes people great..they remain unaffected by criticism..they care not what people have to say about them..We fans are really impractical..
For instance when Nehra gave away runs in the match against South Africa we lambasted him..
This takes me back to the 2003 world cup
India had a horrid beginning to the tournament, their first match was against minnows Holland, who tumbled the Indian batsmen out for just 204 but India ended up winning by 68 runs, the unconvincing victory setting the stage for immense criticism. The next match on India's list was against world champions Australia. The Indian team, batting first..India were out for 125. Australia scored the target in 22.2 overs, only losing one wicket. The Indian performances in the first two matches triggered uproar within India, player effigies were said to be burnt on streets

India moved and won the next matches against Zimbabwe and Namibia. India finished off the Pool Stage with an 82 run victory over England and a 6 wicket victory over Pakistan. Ashish Nehra achieved 6/23 against England to help India defend 250 as England were all out for 168.

That reminds me of the very famous lines from Julius Caesar when Antony remarks
“The evil that men do lives after them,The good is oft interred(buried) with their bones”

Its very easy for us to pontificate and say how this shot should have been played,or how that ball should have been chased..or how that extra leap should have been taken to grab the ball..
The worst was 2007 world Cup when public’s wrath knew no end
India's World Cup campaign started disastrously, as they lost to Bangladesh in the opener, leaving them with two must-win matches in their group. India next scored 413 against Bermuda India won the game by 257 runs, and this left them to beat tournament favorites Sri Lanka. Due to their loss to Bangladesh, India's presence in the tournament depended on them defeating Sri Lanka.
At the Queen's Park Oval at Trinidad, on 23 March, the Indian pace bowlers made early inroads, dismissing the danger men,the Sri Lankan innings ended for 254 for the loss of 6 wickets.
The Indians batting crumbled against the Sri Lankan bowling attack, India were all out for only 185, considered surprising given India's batting strength and the batting-friendly nature of the Queen's Park Oval. With one victory and two losses, India were hence knocked out of the World Cup. It was also the first time since 1992 that the Indian cricket team failed to progress to the latter stages of the tournament.
After the debacle, there were several attacks on players homes and protests by infuriated fans, especially in Bangalore and Mumbai.Such volatile can we be ..Fans even burnt posters of GOD.

No wonder the cricketers say so morosely in the Birla Sun Life Insurance advt “Jab tak Balla hai that hai” ( Glory will stay till runs emanate out of the bat)

“A critic is someone who never actually goes to the battle, yet who afterwards comes out shooting the wounded”
So I learn a lesson here..bouquets and brickbats will always be there what matters most is BELIEF in yourself and your decisions..
With great power ..comes great responsibility..
Thanks to you men in blue for having braved fan pressure and performing "bleedingly" well

Here’s a lovely piece from the movie ratatouille by where the critic confesses his job as

“ In many ways the work of a critic is easy, we risk very little yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves our judgement,we thrive on negative criticism which is fond to write and to read...but the bitter truth that we critics must face is that in the grand scheme of things the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating itself and there are times when a critic truly risks something and that is in the discovery and defence of the new ...the world is often unkind to the new talent ,new creation but new needs friends....”

WHICH COLOUR DO YOU CHOOSE?

2011-03-20T18:07:00.000+05:30

Imagine …...
What if we Homo sapiens had no rods and cones(photo receptor cells) to see the colours..Imagine what if the only colours we could see would be black and white?
Why would Google name its browser CHROME and what would the logo of WINDOWS look like?... 4 plain boxes??
Why would Beatles have given the hit “ the yellow submarine?” or how would be humming our desi hit “Neele neele ambar…”
How would the doctors see the Red Blood cells and figure out the yellow disease of Jaundice?
Why would we hanker after Red meat,Red wine,Chocolate cake,Saffron Lassi??
We would not be spending hours on deciding which colour car to buy?
We would not be spending that extra money to get a bright coloured mobile phone..
You could get your house coloured in black and white?
Vehicles would be bumping into each other as Traffic signal would have no meaning…no green,no yellow and no Red…
What would you gift your Girlfriend?
A white rose or a black one?
What would a bride be in?A black and white “joda”? What would happen to the red vermillion on her hair?
What about the intricate and lustrous Gold jewellery?
Though Men would be thanking that they now don’t have to wait hours while their spouses decided which colour dress to buy or put on…
But then How would India be “men in blue” and Pakistan “in green”?
How would you support the RED DEVILS and THE BLUES?
What fun would it be to see a football match without RED card and YELLOW card?
What would business be like?
No PINK slip,no RED herring prospectus,no BLUE print,no YELLOW pages and most importantly no GREENBACK.
Though Business suits would still be the same formal black and white with black and white ties.

What fun would it be watching AVATAR and Harry Potter in a dual chrome mode? What fun would Parle POPPINS and Cadbury GEMS be?How distinctly different would the SUPERMAN,BATMAN,SPIDERMAN and GREEN GOBLIN be?Why would young Girls dress themselves as some PINK fairy in the fancy dress competition?
Why would the teacher be teaching you Rainbow and later go on to teach you Dispersion and Newton’s and Rayleigh’s experiment with spectrum?(Though that would reduce the syllabus a lot)
How easy it would be to tell mom that u’ve spilled ink from your fountain pen and not ketchup?
Crayons would have no meaning..

Why would Grandma worship NEELKANTH ? and why would she be watching “baalika vadhu” on COLOURS channel.
Why would I be here writing this post had I not got a holiday on the occasion of “HOLI”?
HAPPY HOLI……
Imagine a life without so many hues?
But luckily most of us can see and enjoy these various hues..
Yet there are a lot amongst us who cannot see ..who don’t know what colours look like…who don’t know what HOLI is like..
LET YOUR EYES CHANGE SOMEONE’S LIFE ..

COLOUR THE BLIND

45 and counting...

2011-03-08T09:00:00.000+05:30

Around 45 and still counting..no I’m not counting Sachin’s ODI centuries..neither am I keeping a track of Brad Pitt’s age..and definitely not watching Megan Fox’s weight..
I must have seen the movie SWADES some 45 times..and I’m not alone..as Wikipedia says it has a cult following in India and South Asia..
The time this movie released I must have been in class 12 or so..
When I first asked a few friends how the movie was their reply was “preachy and boring”
Truly what is one man’s meat is the other man’s poison ..and when I watched this movie..it turned out to be more than meat for me..It left me with an amazingly awe inspiring feeling..
Philosophical,patriotic,brooding,musical and definitely romantic
The “dehati(rustic)” in me was aroused...the beauty lied in the extreme simplicity of the script .. even though the movie was a bit long(194 minutes)
Ashutosh Gowarikar churned a fantastic screenplay...and I am sure all connoisseurs and people in their right minds will agree with me...
The brilliant and sensitive acting by Shah Rukh Khan in this movie just corroborates the fact that Khan knows the art of emoting...Gayatri Joshi plays her part with utter finesse...though she could have been better at emoting..
Her character as Geeta was very special because it was one of the rare occasions in which Bollywood took some pride in showing the lead female having a great deal of brain..that could be a good reason why it didn’t create a commercial success..after all there weren't “item numbers in dishabille state”

Geeta has a mind of her own..highly opiniated ..and crunches numbers with as ease as probably Shakuntala Devi that leaves the NASA scientist SRK woooed ..though having completed her education from DU..she believes she is doing her best for the country by working at the grassroot level by educating children..There is a scene where she snubs a marriage alliance because she wants to work after her marriage .
I personally think the National Literacy Mission or National Commission for Women should take up this scene as an ad campaign after all SRK is a household name..

Bhanu Athaiya(who won the Oscar for best costume design for Gandhi) has used great hues and dressed the characters in colours that gel so perfectly well with the plot.. who so ever thought sarees and salwar suits are a passé?
Geeta in her sarees and salwar suits is a sight to behold....and Mohan with his suave self epitomises the man any father would want his daughter to marry..The two character always agree to disagree..
There are good number of instances when they debate on what each of them is doing for the good of society...like when Mohan says how “you Indians keep defending yourself by using culture and tradition as shields” and when Gita says yes to Mohan’s marriage proposal but disagrees to settle in USA ..she even calls him “Non Returning Indian (NRI)”

Kaveri Amma’s role played Kishori Bala is stuffs most of our grandparents are made of..
Compassionate,wise but still obfuscated by “gen next”
I mean I was dumbstruck when A.R rahman won Oscars for Slumdog Millionaire.
It definitely wasn’t his magnum opus.Every movie is made of dialogues and scenes and background score
The jury should have listened to the background score of swades and also the songs.
Alas Rahman didn’t even win a desi filmfare for his work in Swades..He lost to none other than Copy Cat Anu Malik..
The soulful use of Shehnai in the title theme of Swades...and the simple humming that lends divinity to this track...Aaahh..
The lyrics by Javed Akhtar of the song “yun hi chala chal rahi”..my favourite lines being
“Har sapna sach lage, jo prem agan jale
Jo raah tu chale apne mann ki
Har pal ki seep se moti hi tu chune
Jo sada tu sune apne mann ki”..i wont translate these lines..theyll lose their essence..
Romantic undercurrents going in the movie..be it when Mohan is mesmerised by Geeta’s intelligence or when Geeta gives side glances at Mohan when the villagers are watching Zeenat Aman’s song “chura liya hai tumne jo dilko”
When Mohan heaves a sigh of relief when Geeta rejects her marriage alliance with someone else..
When Mohan is lost in awe of Geeta as she teaches him to tie the Dhoti..

or when he peeps by her window when she’s correcting papers..
Geeta confesses her love for Mohan when he’s busy working on hydroelectric project..
And the best of it when Mohan sweeps Geeta of her feet in her own classroom..

Coming to the strong social message the movie sends..

Ask not countrymen what the country can do for you..ask what you can do for the country.
For most of us who like to boast about our NRI relatives..
Mohan is appalled by the state of the country side ..but slowly in a matter of days gives up mineral water and his caravan..starts sleeping on the charpoy and bathes by the well..
Comes to know about the great divide between the haves and the have-nots..illiteracy.
The most poignant scene being the one in which the small boy is trying to sell water.

Mohan is shaken to see how villagers have become complacent with life in dark..when ironically one of them utters out “Ravana burning looks so splendid in the dark”
He starts on his mission of producing hydroelectric power.This is inspired by the true story of Aravinda Pillalamarri and Ravi Kuchimanchi, the NRI couple who returned to India and developed the pedal power generator to light remote, off-the-grid village schools...and he does it.
I remember my Mech Prof. Asking us about the turbine principle behind Swades? So there were others too appreciating the movie I thought.
When Mohan is called back to NASA folks in the village of charanpur are saddened .They don’t want him to go back ..One of them remarks “Its like apni hi chaukhat ka diya giving light to neighbour’s house”
At last Mohan goes back to NASA but isn’t happy there..he decides to come back to his SWADES..
And continue research at Vikram Sarabhai Space Centre
He’s thoroughly discouraged by his colleagues who say he’s being “foolishly romantic”
And when he submits his resignation to his boss ;his boss exclaims how he “could be going places”if he stayed with NASA
To which Mohan replies “I am going places” with a sparkle in his eyes...

I finish this blog with Swades being played in the background of my laptop.....still counting..

LITTI CHOKHA OR ROSOGULLA

2011-02-10T14:33:00.000+05:30

I have always been asked about my roots??
"U look like a bong but your surname is Ranjan?"
My mother has been accosted by few Bengali women at parties
When the Bengali ladies nonchalantly start talking to her in Bengali easily assuming she is one...
Until my mom has to break their Rosogulla in mouth epiphany and say “No,I am not what u think..I cannot speak Bengali”
Given the fact that we were Bengalis some five generations back,my great grandfather also wrote Bengali poetry...
We came to then undivided Bengal’s while my ancestors were practsing tehsildars(tax collectors)
They settled in the present Bihari village near Bhagalpur,they learnt the language of the land and embraced the language called ANGIKA, angika comes from Anga..the mythological land of Karna..... And post independence when it became difficult for them to get jobs because of their Bengali surname “Ghosh” they changed it to “Verma” .There were many families like these who form a very small and closed community...so much so when there are alliances or marriage proposals everyone ends up being related to /or knowing the other one....While some Bengalis look down on us saying "How could you have forgone ur language?"
Well,my ancestors did it..so i dont owe an explanation of defence.....

So, when very often I am asked, “ what are you?”
To which my spontaneous reply is “A girl,if you havnt figured out till now”
The conversation starts to spiral until I am jolted with “ No,what I mean to ask is are you a Bengali or Bihari?? I mean you look like a bong,your Grandma the other day I saw was draping a bong saree,you were talking on the phone in hindi but addressing your aunt as Pisi and uncle as kaku”

If I judge that I have enough time to satisfy the enquirer's curiousity i try to explain them my ancestral lineage...a bit more than what I have tried to explain in my blog....
After that 10 minutes of history I am still asked “ Ok...so I understand...but how do u wish to be called now a bong or bihari?”
Oh my God!! Hey bhagwan!! Thakur kichhoo kor! How does Katrina Kaif manage in Bollywood Circuit with such mixed roots!! Oh I forgot she’s too hot not to be socially acceptable...

There are other times when I see that its no use obfuscating the person in front of me...I simply say.."Look I'm a Bihari,hope u got no problems with that?"
after all I can speak flawless Hindi but flawful Bengali....
and I know that the person isn’t ever going to turn up for any my family marriages (which even today take place the Bengali way..)

If its a near and dear friend who has asked me if I am a Bong or Bihari to which I reply “ I am actually both” .... they look at me with that cunning smile and say ... “Oh!! your parents had a love marriage..Its gonna be so easy for u convincing them if u find a suitable boy urself..they so much will understand your situation”
How I wish the above statements could be true ....

The times when I experience those twisted chuckles at the back of my mind is when
I am either surrounded by non-Bong friends who start complaining of how
The bong kids are pampered ..the concept of “Shonar chhele” where the boy needs to get Z+ security before leaving his home..the boy will be mollycoddled and stuffed with sweater and bear caps lest he catches cold..or when his parents will rush in from any corner of the world to feed him Paish,Machher Jhol aar Baiguun Bhaja”
The fact that when two Bengalis meet they’ll talk only in Bengali(their aami tumi) and if you happen to be a non bong in that circuit....they’ll treat you as if you were a mere lamp post..simply non existent...

That's when the Bong in me gets aroused to refute back that most reasearchers or Professors at top notch universities are either Tam Brams or Bengalies...
Oh come on!! We have to accept the love for literature ,music and arts can be seen in every nook of Kolkata..
And also admire the fact that they take pride in their language... though also agreeing that it becomes a trouble at times when they happen to neglect the non-bengali speaking person...

Again I cant say for sure which category i fall into....

And the observation my bong friends would make
“oye daakh..Bihari gunda(look at the Bihari goon)..and they'll talk about the incorrigible habit of biharis
Chewing the Paan(beetle leaf) with the red slime dripping out of the mouth...and the ubiquitous spit patterns around ...and if not that the tobacco(read:khaini) rubbing on the palms...
Be it Delhi University or any other University we “bhaiyaas” have earned a recognition for our the uncouth and brusque attitude of bullying..after all we have that isshpunk and isshtyle...showcased in the hits like Dabbang
The habit of pulling train’s chain wherever we want..bursting inside reserved sleeper compartments and scaring people out of their wits and forcing them to give away their booked seats...eve teasing..kidnapping
Talking at the highest decibel on mobile phones with LALOOISH accent..

In defence i’d make clear that Bihari’s have the brightest minds especially when you look at the IIT JEE merit lists and UPSC merit lists...We've toppled corrupt governments..
And the situation in Bihar is changing now for good with it skyrocketing GDP..
Having said so much I’ve enjoyed great company with both BONG and Bihari friends...
Growing up in a Para(colony) where the Bongs and Biharis stayed in the same apartment blocks..and Bihari guys pursuing Bong girls..
I love Litti chokha as much as I love Sondesh...
At my home we celebrate Durga &Lokhhi Puja as well as Chhatt with equal fervour..

I can so clearly write about the traits because I have traits of both or as I would like to believe traits of none...I can be a virtual portmanteau or an oxymoron..depends on what u want me to be...
Finally I have a great idea ..the next time some one asks me “Are u a ......?”
My reply “ just log on to http://shrillvoices.blogspot.com
Gosh!! what is it going to be like if someday in future my kids are asked the same question?
Long live blogspot!

ABSOLUT SOLUTION

2011-01-24T22:53:00.000+05:30

Quite a few friends of mine have wanted to see me drunk...as they truly believe I’ll give them quite an amusing entertainment package when I’m “out”..
Now for all you men reading this “come on... don’t give that LADIES AREN’T EXPECTED TO DRINK...looks”
But I have never given them this opportunity till date and cannot say for sure If I ever will..I don’t attach any taboo to the concept of drinking...but yes, this thought does occur to me at times..what if I keep gulping the drink non stop... and let the situation out of control...
Naa..I don’t want to create a public nuisance...
And what trigerred this blog was the movie “no one killed Jessica”
Is drunkenness that insane and irrational that it can make a man kill a woman who just refused him to serve more...
Then I wondered this is not it...
There are many Jessicas in India..though the damage in those cases don’t always result in the fatality as this one did...
I know Munia my domestic help refuses to get married because she says that in her community men beat the women black and blue and abuse them to the extent of death if the women; who after a day’s hard work of washing clothes,sweeping floors,or selling vegetables refuses to part with their hard earned money...
As a child having grown up in Jharkhand where the local liquor called “ hadia” fermented rice with “mohua” is sold like cold drinks in every other nook and cranny..I remember how our moms used to be worried about us until we were back from tuitions or schools..lest some drunkard was on a loose in the neighbourhood basti
Personally drinking has never appealed to me but people refute saying “ its a personal choice...”
But it doesn’t become a personal choice when you’re out there in a party ,sloshed drunk..with little or no control over your brain and then start mouthing obsceneties,..
And performing histrionincs that leave people in and around you uncomfortable...
If you are smart and cerebral enough a person who just enjoys drinking in social gatherings to the effect that you don’t create a nuisance and are well under control..then nothing like it!! May you meet all the pretty girls you’ve ever thought of...But those of you who don’t know where to draw the line..and drink as if there’s never ever going to be a tomorrow ,consequently dehydrating your entire body and de-sensing your brain...and proudly proclaim..”I’ll drink as much as I want to..Its my choice”...
Its in no way a personal choice as your callous drinking behaviour adversely affects others as you puke and leave the floor,car dirty with someone else to clean it...and someone else to pay the bill..
Its not a personal choice, when in order to “de-stress” men consume alcohol in copious quantities and end up unleashing their heightened libido on any woman whom they come across..
Why ???..........haven’t we read of those innumerable news clippings where in some policemen and in many cases spoilt brats in drunken stupor have molested women..
Cases when some dipsomaniac may have boarded a train and causes discomfort to women and people around...
Drinking is not a personal choice when you(men and women) are totally inebriated and under influence and cant see the road ahead or the vehicle ahead and ram into the next vehicle coming on the road or run over some mere mortal and take his life away in the blink of an eye..

Wiki lift:
Of the adult US population, at least 75% are drinkers; and about 6% of the total group are alcoholics. In groups which are almost 100% drinkers, the alcoholism rate is about 8%. Many reports state that about 73% of felonies are alcohol-related. One survey shows that in about 67% of child-beating cases, 41% of forcible rape cases, 80% of wife-battering, 72% of stabbings, and 83% of homicides, either the attacker or the victim or both had been drinking.The case is not different with India as well..

Same irksome feelings for smokers as well..
I have not understood atleast why so called “aware and educated” give in to smoking knowing fully well that its not good for anyone on the planet...not good for the small kids in the bidi and cigarette industry..not good for the passive smoker next to you..and definitely its not going to do you any good!!
And trust me guys!!girls don’t get attracted to men who prove their machismo by smoking cigarettes..and for you girls who smoke this is what the HEART THROB JOHN ABRAHAM had to say, “I’ve tried to quit smoking..but what I don’t understand is why women smoke?..Its not good for their health as it affects maternity..also they are superior moral beings than men..how can they err”
Any smoker doesn’t want his son or daughter to pick the habbit..why ??
Its not about being too good to be true but about realising why should you be
doing something that isn't good for you

I’ve asked a friend who’s a chain smoker “Dont you know that this could just kill you?”
His reply “ you could die anywhere,here because of an earthquake or there on the street because of an accident”
Now what does one have to say to an argument like that?
True its your wish..its your life...make it better ...
make it worse..Its a personal choice

PLEASE बोलो ना!! ( PLEASE SPEAK)

2010-12-19T16:57:00.000+05:30

Ok tell me
Which one of these two restaurants serves good food?
Swadisht bhojanalalaya or Delicious Restaurant?

Think.....think...

Bang on! Atleast for the 90%...I know that voice inside your head has zeroed in on Delicious restaurant.
Not your fault as you are primed to think that “ Swadisht bhojanalya” has to be some dingy, unhygienic sub urban place where the lower middle class man takes his family out while flies are hovering all around and Delicious Restaurant would be some uptown restaurant where you could get the perfect ambience to take your lady out or hob nob with the best in town....Why?
Because this is what has become the power of language....This is what can be termed as decadence of Hindi..I wish i could have written this piece in Hindi..but alas! Hindi is a passé..and yes I am sorry I haven’t been able to get a firm command on my own language as I have over English..
So, often when my friends have boasted of their attempts of mastering German ,French,Greek etc. and persuaded me to follow the suit...I have pondered over this issue and thought over..Its a shame on me I cannot speak my own language hindi properly..Shouldn’t we put in some effort to learn our own mothertongue??
In a bid to do that, I visited a few renowned libraries around and was dismayed to see the plight of Hindi books...The last row of books...spun with cobwebs..collecting dust and with no eminent Hindi writers...Phew!! and after rummaging a few shelves when I got one and issued it at the counter the librarian was flabbergasted and asked me “You read Hindi?? (as if I’d committed a serious offence)...
” why?” i remarked to which he replied ..just that there are no takers for it..Who reads Hindi these days?
How true!!! Invariably all of us overlook the Hindi newspaper and hunch and scan the reading rooms looking for the English counterpart no matter how many advts. It has... Glossy paper with either underwear advts. Or deshabille actresses, models posing..
Now..come on don’t take me as a fanatic or fundamentalist trying to promulgate Shiv Sena/Bajrang Dal ideologies of Bhartiyata or Hindutva ..This is just a thought that has been crystallising for quite some time.. I totally agree with the lot who say that English is the language that has catapulted the country's growth in the IT sector and in the world business scenario...No wonder China is opening English schools all across to arm the Chinese people with English.. There’s no problem learning as many languages as you want to...but many of us look down on Hindi..dismiss it.. Why aren’t we respecting our own language?? Why look at the Japanese? look at the Germans..look at the French..Have they been left behind?
Next we come to the MAJORITY Fairer sex’s proclivity towards English
The other day I observed this girl in the neighbourhood(I am in Jharkhand,India) at the vegetable vendor who was buying greens..at the end when the vendor settled down on an amount ...on the being told उँचालीस..the girl asked “उँचालीस meaning?? Bhaiya English mein bolo”
Madam the literacy percentage in india is only 68% and about only 23% of the country can speak in English..people like you could please spare such souls and the poor vegetable vendor!!
And I have seen girls struggling with “दाएँ(daayein)” and “बाएँ(baayen)”..
The modern but poor rickshawpuller now knows what’s right and left..or else how will he be able to help them in transit!!
The next big confusion with uptown girls.. what’s “डेढ़(dedh)”& what’s “अडहायी(adhai)”?
Write it down babes.. “one and a half” and “two and a half” respectively...
This is what my dad pointed out..you will always notice even in interviews and press conferences If its Sachin or Amitabh..when asked a question in hindi they will always reply in the same...but have you ever seen pretty actresses or models or Saina Mirza conversing in Hindi..My dad hits back to say..”if these women can speak hindi in the entire movie why is it a problem on the screen??”
And the observer in me has a nice smile..ok!! I agree the only way to attract attention and to be taken seriously when shopping in a mall or ordering in a restaurant is to speak not in hindi.. “ what’s the price?” is more effective than “इसका दाम कितना है?” How many of us actually retain Hindi वर्णमाला(alphabets)??
What strikes me is a single statement English as a conversing medium shows that you have a “status” but speaking in “hindi” aint cool neither “in”..
As my Management friends would say there is a “snob appeal” in the language..
Especially a few days ago when I was seated in a train and there was this female with a child barely 2 years old in her lap... poor kid was being scolded in English “Baby why do u have to be restless?Mommy will fulfil your chocolate cravings..” with his Dad dropping a few Hindi words “अरे ठीक से बैठो” Spare the poor child..
He might just get confused with both the languages being fed in his mind..That reminds me of the latest admission trends in ENGLISH MEDIUM SCHOOLS..
For admission to kindergarten parents’ are interviewed along with the kids..and both the parents’ and the kids’ English speaking enunciation and fluency are checked..More so I have been told parents’ at some of these HI FI schools also need to specify if they have a two wheeler or a 4 wheeler..Why should they send the kid to “English medium school” if the child already knows english..
At a macroscopic level some of us argue that there is nothing called “preservation of language”..culture is a melting pot of time and civilization and every language undergoes change from time to time..sanskrit is a passé and so is pali and prakrit..but i do believe the reason Greek, French and Japanese have been preserved is because people have taken a certain degree of pride in knowing it..treating it as a heritage and passing it from generation to generation..Not throwing it in the dustbins of history ..that’s my point..and its not only about Hindi..its about whatever your mother tongue is..Hindi is mine and so i have written about it..Or are we plain hypocrites ?? because when it comes to movies we still love our “Hollywood inspired” tearjerking Hindi movies(no matter how nonsensical the plot is) and when it comes to songs we’ll whistle and dance to “बीड़ी...मुन्नी...शीला की जवानी” This still gives me some hope of Hindi not becoming completely extinct at least till the time I live ..

P.S i had thought of naming the blog "शीला की ज़ुबानी"..but that would encourage junta to play THE song in loud and repeat mode and aggravate the damage to my eardrum

ADULT CONTENT

2010-10-21T21:13:00.000+05:30

So i sit to write my first adult blog.(hmmm..I can see how excited you must be)
Adult because I’m a fully certified one now.
Earn my own bread and butter and pay my taxes... Worry about the rising petrol prices.Realise what an ordeal it is to stand in queues at the BANKS,POST OFFICES,SCOOTY service stations....
Try to understand share markets.Keen about knowing the real estate return on investment situation.
Indulging in the very feminine attribute of “retail therapy”...
Start understanding the comic strip Dilbert and want more of it to read ...
Feel proud in gifting trinkets and treating my younger cousins boasting to them how they can have scoops of their favourite ice cream without worrying about how much their “didi “ will have to pay ..

Curse the official paper work for every little thing. Each time she comes to know about one of her friends getting engaged or worse getting married...makes her think “Oh my God! Am I approaching marriageable age??”
She manages 2 cell phones..(honest confession..can hardly manage them)
The once gregarious and garrulous Shrill forgets to reply to smses of her huge friend circle as she’s busy...fails to return mails to them..
she enters her room after office and opens the door,its almost a reflex action to pick the newspaper up from the doormat and keep it on the already 5 inch thick stack that has been piling up since day immemorial...
She procrastinates her appointment at the beauty parlour assuming the next day she’ll surely find time...
dabbles in her new found love of badminton or swimming...
Luckily staying in this posh hostel right in the heart of the town ensures that she at least DOESN’T presently need to worry about the LPG connection or depleting gas in the cylinder unlike her friends at different places.She sits with her colleagues /friends/hostelmates in the hostel mess
indulges in gossiping and B****ing about all the crap going at the office..and a certain Mr. X who has made everyone’s life a big mess...realising the mess food menu needs to be tinkered a bit..
Endless discussions on alternative career paths...
Goes back to her room
opens her mail and sees feeds from all the Quiz blogs she once used to frequent everyday,..opens a few of the quizzing links..too lazy to go through them navigates to her facebook page which lacks all the action that used to go on when she was in college..
Pledges to resume blogging
Attends to phone call from her mom who complains “why is ur phone never accessible??why don’t u ever bother to call home”
She quips “Ma Office Office..I’m a pro now...I’m a Professional now..”
Takes the book she has been trying to finish off since about a month,makes a move by going ahead with few pages...and the next she knows is that she has been lulled to sleep..
Untill she’s awakened by shouts and screeches from the next door rooms in the corridor..
“Aaaahhhh....It must again be that same lizard /gecko/chhipkali that must have freaked the girl in neighbouring room...hmmm..let me just switch off the light and go off to sleep..I need rest..I’m a tired soul..I’m a pro..I’m a professional..”

TIME FLIES -3

2010-06-13T19:51:00.000+05:30

Apart from the intellectual gratification quizzing has given me…I must add that it has introduced me to ppl who are now great friends..With Time flies-3 I would like to showcase the friendship I forged with these guys and have learned so much in their company

Prabhakar or PK as we fondly call him is an extremely simple guy but yes not too simple as he too has his own share of fun in mischiefs and indulgences of his own kind…. and gyaan unparalled encompassing all spheres..we first teamed up when I was desperate to form a team to Spring Fest Quiz 2008 but the scene wasn’t certain..ppl were hemming and hawing about coming along..i remember calling up ppl on phone the entire day trying to jugaad a team..So, someone told me about Pk. I was told he was an extremely shy guy..consequently I asked Nikhil Dubey a yr senior to use his seniority and do the talking and convince this new chap to quiz along with us…I still remember Pk what a hit miss the entertainment Quiz was…Ohhhh!! If only we would have paid heed to ur answer “Andaaz” we wud have been in the finals and who knows even won it!!! The next miss was the very recent “hot shot “ answer which we missed out on Lax’s insistence..lesson for a lifetime..hehe

Always calm composed..Connoisseur when it comes to music..Tarquin’s collection on BIT LAN always would be in buzz.. will give u news out of Auto,Biz,movies(deadly knowledge on tamil hindi and any kind of film industry..both original and plagiarised)…yes and do not question Rahman’s talent in front of him..A self proclaimed Rahmaniac…he can any day write a biography on him..Can hit the dance floor with all the zest and zeal and can keep ppl raving about it too..
And yes PK’s credit on all our tours for launching “what is sneha eating photo shoot campaign??” also Pk catches couples on his camera on the fests we’ve been to and without letting them know..
u shud see Pk posing for photos..always in style with one different from the other.. Yo!! Pk the year 2010 broke your jinx of never getting cash from quizzes..keep the coins jingling… hope you do join a Quiz firm after the amazing research and questions you come up with…that has so often left me simply awestruck..and keep that good habit of betting and winning..and lemme kno the nxt time u’re in Jsr

Tanmay the “no nonsense” and now the “lichad banker” who as his friends know hardly ever gets off his computer..Full credit to the rich and regular Quizblog you initiated that’s now acclaimed in the blogosphere..and yes the way Pk and you have gone about mentoring and generating a mass awareness in BIT regarding quizzing too is laudable..The First time Tanmay called me to take part in a college event he went on “Sneha aap hamare saath team up karengi Technieek ke liye”
Oh my God!! My batchmate calling me with so much respect but then i came to know that he’s an Agra waala..so cud understand…Each time you try pulling his leg the poor guy wud just mumble “bhak..kuchh bhi!!”..
Tanmay “Agra is so tacky.Is there anything else apart from taj Mahal there??
“Tanmay likes this ” joke became much too popular because he was too kind to like everything his frnz shared on facebook..C’mon after this joke as Pk and I have noticed u became too choosy and selective about ur “likes” on facebook…Don’t care what ppl say..just keep “liking”
Considering that we shared some similar interests like “HOUSE M.D” ( Yippey at last we did get that T ready..) and south Indian food..
each we pester u about joining a fraudulent bank and the back end job profile…never knew you would take our jokes so seriously so as to ask “honestly tell me why do ppl say that this job suits me…” haha..
A great blogger and official quiz trip accountant and money bank who at the end of every quiz would hand us out a meticulously done balance sheet giving us a brief of our expenses and how much we need to pay and to whom…
and how worked up u were when u asked us “Someone said I look like a hooligan…Do I seriously look like a hooligan..??”
Haha..at least the TTE on the patliputra express must have thought so when we were returning from dhanbad when you faked your identity for a short while though..
Had you asked this question to females in our hstl they wud have denied yelling “No way…Tan is a really decent guy” Quite a fan following Tan..Good Luck !!

That makes me think Ashwyn should think twice before bestowing the honorary title of Ladies Magnet to himself…coz half of the time he’s totally frustrated with the traits of the opposite sex..a chauvinist ,a misogynist..who would go on to say “The Lesser the number of girls in an engg. Colg the better…as guys get distracted and lose vision and enterprise in worldly matters in the company of girls”….haha!! “There aint a single girl with whom I can strike an intellectual conversation” A highly cryptic and eccentric personality which I think he considers his USP…who thinks cell phone is a liability and never keeps one..So if u wanna pass on some info God help!!or check out the dhabas near BIT..
Oh..No..dont ever engage with him in a debate coz he’ll never come round or even listen to your views.. A chain smoker who would go and ignite his brain by a cig before every quiz and once got into trouble when we went for a quiz to a colg that was a “no smoking NIT allahabad campus” Hmmm.. was mesmerized only once when in a Spring fest at IIT kgp saw a lady who was circling smoke with the skill that even he dint possess ..Alas!! she already had her beau next to her
This Guy has an amazing intuition and maestro of guess work..High Fives keep striking each time he gets those answers out of nowhere..
I must add his oneliners and bonmots add zest to our group and yes his frnz will totally agree how we do miss his tattle tongue when he’s not around…After also having worked with him in the Training and Placement Cell he will always be courteous in getting food for ppl he knows ;and also girls he doesn’t know...gets in trouble at times but yes nonchalantly gets out of it too..Will always miss the scene when u need him urgently as he’s out whiffing taking a break….

Ahhh..that one day Kolkata trip to quiz at Science city..when we decided to walk from science city to park street after figuring it out on a google earth map not to scale… tell a calcuttan this and they’ll laugh to pieces as the distance is unfathomable..The quizzical way we went exploring esplanade..and my suggestions u guys have always trusted whenever it comes to fooding…Remember how we crossed the thoroughfare near esplanade the four of us running across the square at 9 at night as there was no stop to the raining kolkata traffic…Rosogullas at KC das and idli at Dulal Nandi… Slept all through the lecture while some IIM prof went pontificating about strategy…and hooted at the SF quizmaster this time…chatted till 5 am in Hatia Howrah about anything and everything under the sun..and yes when Lakshmi suffered from that virulent sun stroke on our way back from MLNIT after making a clean sweep at Gnosiomania Quiz fest …what a tough time we faced getting her deported to the hospital..still we all braved it knowing we were together..
I’ll miss those innumerable discussion sessions on gtalk and bakar that have made us a team Q-BIT..and the long distances we’ve travelled together..as we’ll now be busy Quenching Life’s Curiosity…

TIME FLIES - 2

2010-05-16T00:37:00.000+05:30

What a great day to write a blog..today I’ve packed lock stock and barrel reached home leaving the college…and as the old song goes.. “I guess nothing lasts forever…”
Now I really wonder why some of the bestsellers are woven along the threads of college life…why sid,akash and sameer made DCH timeless??
Or why five point someone was a nation wide hit??

I wouldn’t have cried,while leaving my frnz….No,seriously philosophical as it may sound..but the joy that you have given me outdoes the grief I am struck with when I leave you……So here it goes:I can seriously write a biopic on the mentioned people..but yes let me see how bad I am at summarizing..

Dear Lax:
I never thought I’ll meet someone so similar to me..yet so different from me..girl!!I feel so proud of having had an association with you…If there could be a “Phunsuk Wangdu” with a gender reversal I bet she would have been pretty much like you..and yes when I listen to the song.. “Behti hawa sa thha who…” Its u on the periphery of my thoughts..
I remember how Annie and I were awestruck when we used to see you go write the exam without studying and that too after having had a good time sleep for 8 hrs..how u would fidget around about one hour before the exam..and come across our room properly dressed up saying..”hum kuchh padhai nahi kiyein hain”...while we were trying to hold onto the last straw as drowning examinees..

How can I forget the pranks zeenat and I played by singing all the “PARDESI” featuring bollywood songs..and yes victory!!especially for shilpika and myself as we transformed you from a total Hindi-ignorant to the sweetest Hindi speaker amongst us..But sad!! I know It’ll be gone in 60 seconds as soon as you leave the place…and yes next few years you’’l be ready with accented Canadian English..Oh yeah thanks for capturing those lovely images..:P :P

Rebel..free thinker..vegan…fitness freak..a humungous hogger...F-1 junkie..geek..sprinter..lawn tennis star..a superb artist,environmentalist, animal lover,quizzer,a stellar chef…ahhh a proud MAC user...oh yeah and an amazing conversationalist..for all those who love masala..churned controversial gossips..LAX is anyday a delight as she proudly says “I love controversies..” and yes for those who take pleasure in knowledge and all scholarly gyaan..enjoy her company…

Dear Zeenat..
Of all the crazy and nonsensical songs and shrieks we’ve made..ahh I’ll miss them..i remember how in the first sem I had this opinion about you of a juvenile school girl as you would imitate voices of all possible creatures..Dogs..cats..Phew!!
And yes need I mention short term memory loss..or the Zeenat field effect wherein under your influence..we forgot everybody else’s name..
Need I mention how u once shouted X by the name Y..and the case being X and Y just hated each other…..the best being how during the end sems you sat for the exam and when the examiner asked you “which exam?” you went blank…no answer at all…until someone else answered that… trying hard to remember why u were there?? Haha…the prof sure had a good time when he asked you at the end of exam…..”now u know which exam you came for”…. the ever creative ,artistic and bubbly Zeenat..paradoxically laziest person I know who found it even hard to go lift a pen from the next table…At the same time I’ll miss the trips to Sports complex…the badminton we played .the nature lover talks..the WARREN BUFFET funda of not carrying the cellphone….those witty one liners..

Dear Shilpika…
In the first year I just knew you as the girl who came to the college on the first day..sat next to me..and the first question she asked me “ how much is ur AIEEE rank??.Yahaan placemets kaise hote hain??highest placement offer kitne ka gaya??”…Ooops..wrong person I thought..Now u know why I never talked to you again during the entire first year..I never thought a day would come when you would become completely stop thinking about placements..and prepare for UPSC day and night..Good LUCK gal!! and keep those one-liners coming..and yes I’ll miss how crazily and whackily we were the first ones to burst out dancing during anyone’s birthday!!
Aaahhhhh…shilpika plzzz…plzzz..dont go to anyone else in the world with your silly doubts…just give me a BSNL call..and yes change your taste…gorillas are a passé…have a new interest…(wink wink)
Hope you rule your jurisdiction with the same guts as you rule hearts..If there was one person on whom all the jokes were played..It sure had to be you..
Dear Neha….
Sweet…pretty…always ready to help…ready with suggestions..extremely practical and lady like…thanks fr teaching me the art of bargaining…and I thought only I could haggle to save those pennies..i should delete “shrillonomics”…thanks for taking me through the nook and crannies of Ranchi…oh yes and the restaurant suggestions have helped me a lot…I really admire the big sister way you would tend to Rasna…and your fiercely independent attitude…street smart..and other beautiful times we spent ragging shilpika shukla…

Dear Ananya…
3 years one room…one word "Thank you…"
You know I can’t put it in words….

At times ppl don’t weep when they see their frnz off till the station or till the time they’ve said the last goodbye…they look behind cherish those memories..and think….. “Yaar…what days…..!!” a tear or 2 maybe roll down at times..and then there will be smiles again….

TIME FLIES-1

2010-03-28T22:10:00.000+05:30

Each time I wrote a post on my blog..I’ve wanted people to read it and like it..For the first time I’m trying to lift that burden off me..after all life shouldn’t always be about pleasing others… you Also need to do what you like doing ….simply to please your own self....And here I am with a series dedicated to the wonderful people I’ve met in these 4 years of college ,who have enriched my life by staying with me in lovely times gone by…and more importantly taught me a lot about life..
I sure will retell them to my children and grandchildren in years to come…for these will reside in the core of my heart...
Being a Taurus,I like being Secretive about myself,for once I’ll spill the beans…
There are many I express my gratitude to..A few I’ll write about coz U’ve made me who I am now…today..

Chronologically

PRIYANKA & MEGHA (Pranka & Bondhu respectively) –
You 2 were the only people I knew when I came here..
I’m happy megha learned to smile and started to enjoy life and taking it less seriously because in Pranka’s company any one can laugh...each time I uttered a joke or an “idea” you guys would come up with…
“Shut up Sneha”..yeah and that impromptu “dil dooba” dance that we captured that looked like choreographed when it reached others..
and the number of times you guys would rush into my rooms and then hurriedly get out and ask me to clean it saying… “kuchh to safai aur organization seekho…”
Remember how worried u were at the mess table when I asked U how much I had scored in Maths 2 and you were so afraid to tell me I’d got a single digit 8/25…and from then on always egged on to me to study..
And Gals ..so much of weight loss tips..that I shrunk from 78 kgs to my present state..
“Sneha,how very unpredictable and how very Confused??”you guys would scream…
each time when I wasn’t sure if I would go home or not…If I would goto class or not…I would eat or not..had my own unplanned lost world…
Yeah yeah..my phone never buzzed in the first year..never got those blank calls…and never got to hear those pick up lines in Fugia or Valentines day unlike you….BITOTSAV was great when we decided at the last moment to plunge in and got that bullock cart inside the campus..we were the DESIMAL (pun intended)..With the advent of DC++ and internet We’d flock on one computer..chat,watch movies..
Most often conversations spurred by each one of us shouting aloud from our rooms…at times in codewords..
my Reliance network was euphemistically messy..And the LH classrooms where we would take turns in sleeping and commenting on others…star ratings..I needn’t mention in the public purview of what a vantage point we had as PMC was close to our hostel and we saw all dudes,darlings live and exclusive..
Pranka would come with the whackiest practical jokes…and gutsiest dares…As time has passed..we changed..so have our equations..
for better or worse..I cannot say....I’ll always look back to the powerpuffed gals…and remember bubbles,blossoms and buttercups..

NADU and HAANTHHI:
To these great guys who introduced me to college Quizzing…blogging..reading..and still fill me with inspiration each time we confabulate…and Man nadu!! Its only now that I know what God like reverence ppl in all batches have had for u especially girls(if u’re reading this..smile)..lucky to have had u as a mentor ,friend ,philosopher and Guide..
and Haanthhi as a socialite..u cud seriously make Paris Hilton feel belittled..not to mention that elephantine memory…and not to mention those quirky flip flops..
why would a final year guy going to IIT Kgp with his gang of friends to have a great time partying and Quizzing bother to take a first year nobody to Quizzing??only because she had once requested to be introduced to quizzing..loyalty towards your frnz; I remember u told me is of utmost importance to you; and I realized it in all these years..And this is what you told me.. “I want you to get exposure to college quizzing and continue it because things fizz out easily in BIT..”
I’ve tried my best nadu…
And that adventurous Trip to Kgp will always be afresh with you,Sumit,khadke,Rathore,Anish and Haanthhi..Felt so lucky to have come in contact with Super Seniors like you guys…may you continue your work on assistive technologies and may ur very special dream come true…
Haanthhi..NKV Shouldn’t you be sorry for the number of times u’ve kept ppl waiting??actually..No..coz u compensate for it by giving them the GYAAN..that even encyclopedias may fail..A breathless speaker..who would just prattle his gobbledegook in one dizzy breath..that many times havnt made any sense to me..but just admire him for the way he is…sweet and at times EMO..the first time I met him he cussed out aloud on the stage in front of a Ranchi audience..Oh My God!!what did he just say??why do I keep hearing that four lettered word every time in college…sorry haanthhi but that was new to me..
A mimicry artist who is by far the best in imitating me..and yes..do watch the movie Haanthhi suggests..

Ankhuri,Shradha,Sonam,Monica,Kritika,Khowla—

SHRADHA Madam..ever since u taught me BEE I told u one day u’re gonna be a big proff one day…now seeing ur journals published in MIT’s pyre and IEEE journals..Good luck with MS+Phd at Texas

ANKHURI—what a combination of beauty,style and sensibility and talent..As I’ve always felt ideal Girl and Ideal “bahu”
SONAM and KHOWALA-ur deadly short forms and innocence and woah that dance..guys I know in these 4 years u’ve never reached class on time..hope ur boss is able to teach u a lesson…
KRITIKA and MONICA—sweet,smiling and pure fun..

to be continued...lots of other frnz to come..

SNAP and SHOT- EPILOGUE

2010-01-10T14:25:00.000+05:30

And this is what happened after i told them the entire story...
In the car this was what ensued..
Dad..”beta, I don’t think the uncles were wrong Shrill,you better start thinking about your future career..These days everyone’s an engineer..Its like those cell phones which people earlier craved so much for,but now have become as common as a toilet soap..”
To which my mom added..”let it go..children these days are too audacious..they want everything according to their own will..be it work or spouse”
“No respect for elders.....”

I was mumbling...”Oh no not again please...”

Look at your cousins Harish,In the States..aren’t they making their parents proud..see you need to do something worthwhile in life...
Hmmm...worthwhile...you need to have at least one I in India to be RESPECTED in India...IAS,IIM or IIT
You could be a charlatan in USA,but if your son or daughter is in USA that’s the way you’re recognised..thats your star appeal...
And then this is what i had to say to Dad...
(I very frankly hate giving explanation as to why I am doing what...
But this was one time when i had to explain my folks...because i thought i owed them an explanation...after all they were the ones who brought me here)
“Mom and Dad...I’ve always done what I’ve wanted to do...
You guys never forced me...
Ate as much I wanted..ate what I wanted..slept when I wanted..read when I wanted..played when I wanted...made friends with whom i wanted..
So much so...I even learnt to cycle on my own..without anybody’s help..it took me few months..but I am proud you left me to do things on my own...

I remember when I must have been 5,once I was craving for that pastry inside that big confectionary shop...you just gave me the money and asked me to fetch it for myself...while you went far away from the store.... I felt so helpless,looked around the entire store...but finally took the pastry in the basket went up the cash counter and paid the bill...
You left me so that I could learn things on my own...
That one time when you always used to drop me for “sit and draw” competitions but again stood far away near the parking and never looked,even once, at what I was painting..because you didn’t want me to be conscious..and didn’t want to influence my painting...
Never gave those pat on my backs,never cheered,never clicked photos Whenever I went up on stage...
Just because you wanted me to do things on my own..
Learn on my own....
Didnt you say how you lost interest in studies each time Dadaji(Grandpa) asked you to sit down and study and never let you play Cricket...
Wasn’t that the reason you bought Bro that high priced tennis racket that when he said he wanted to play TT..

And this is what I’ve learned and plan to do..
Papa and Mummy..I want to see things and learn things on my own...Yes,I’ll work in what gives me pleasure...fine...if at all I wanna change it..I will..but then It’ll be according to what I’d want.. I want to explore avenues by myself ...who knows I might take up writing as a career or teaching...
I get pleasure in doing simple plain things..Waking up early morning..going out for a walk or run,reading good stuffs,Being with friends...and doing my work with honesty and integrity even if its menial and meaningless to others....its great to me...
The bottom line is Every one wants to stay happy and we as homo sapiens are designed to keep ourselves happy...I’d never want to chose a career option..or for that matter even my man because others want me to do so...or because the amount of money it has...or because its ”upmarket”..
I know people will call me a loser but trust me I’ll be a HAPPY LOSER..
So shouldn’t you just be bothered about whether I am Happy or not?

P.S This was written long before i watched 3 idiots,as its prequel was long back in AUG..
and its a good things my parents dont quite read my blog...
Written while listening to ANIMAL SONG by SAVAGE GARDEN

SNAP & SHOT

2009-08-16T23:14:00.001+05:30

I am in my early twenties and have actually turned a way too schizophrenic…..that just can explain my long absence from blogosphere…
It could even be a PTSD(post trauma stress disorder) after what happened when I ended up in a get-to-gether (which I now so avoid..)
While my parents were busy confabulating with other folks I ran into their old friends at one table..
Mehta Uncle started off
“So, shrill what next??MBA ,IAS,GRE….???”
And as I spurt out that reply which my people so heartily dislike…
”I don’t know, ummm….have yet to figure out”
Mehta Uncle continued to proffer pearls of wisdom..“Why not try for an MBA ??”…hehe...Mediocre But Arrogant…It reminded me of..
“All engineers go for it…helps you earn manifold of what you get as an engineer. And then there is no Brand as Brand IIM…”
I wonder who created it and fanned this craze..…
“just get through this one and the world becomes your oyster..u’ll have a farmhouse in Australia,penthouse in manhattan …
I added..what else uncle…??Swimming pool in French Riviera and luxury loo in Las Vegas??...
He agreed “yes..yes..why not,why not definitely..see u already are so ambitious…just a bit disillusioned..never mind..
Know what??I’ll introduce you to my bestfriend’s brother’s wife’s sisters’s grandson who’s just got into IIM-A and already got a summer Intern at an investment bank:”
I asked…”U still think I-banks are that respectable after all that happened….”
He later added in a serious tenor “But remember smart and good looking ppl are always at an advantage in a profession like that and will have an edge over you”
I gushed out in my mind“Excuse me!!Was that supposed to be a warning or advice”
But I didn’t say anything coz it would again start that old humdrum of
“Girl you should know to respect elders….blahhh…blahh..not to argue with them and never to answer them back…Is that what ur parents have taught you??”..I’ve always seen that every elderly person be it your college admin people, the corrupt TTE in train or morally bankrupt Govt. clerk will use the above lines as their trump card when they’ll realize that there’s nothing logical they have to say against your point..
Time for the next career counseling by Mr.Sharma
“Beta, I tell u, u should join the IAS(read:Indian Artifice Services)…There is nothing like it…u’ll have a royal life..will roam in cars with beacon and sirening all about..making your way across traffic…u’ll have a retinue of staff to answer under your beck and call..people all around will salute u ..and respectably call u”MADAM…” “your children will get the best of education and yes u can also earn a lot of money if you want to(winkingly)…..Of course you’ll get to order the general public and masses and keep the entire city/state under your control……..How proud will your parents be and society will treat them with so much of izzat if only u fulfill this dream of theirs……”

Hmmm…I thought it was supposed to be UPSC..Union PUBLIC SERVICE commission but here in the above monologue there was no mere mention of the public service…what about the half-dozen of transfer and suspension orders within a month when you want things to be put right. What about feeling like a piece of trash when working with ministers who cant make a difference between a and z but are busy slicing their birthday cakes..

Why should Gupta Uncle stay shut??
”Ohhhh…No, why waste all those four years of strenuous effort u spent trying to become an engineer??”
Hmmm..I smiled…4 years of hard work…my room mate back in colg will start rolling on the floor with laughter if she gets to know the existence of this statement in my context..
Uncle continued “Our research facilities in India are in shambolic condition…write GRE(Great Racism Experience)…Its damn easy I tell you..and go get an M.S and continue it up to Ph.D in US…join some research lab..Life of a scientist is so convenient..All day in lab…you wont even have to work in the smoke effusing Steel Plants...Who knows you could be our next Madame Curie??”
This is what was going in my mind..Thank you uncle for such great expectations,but I am too restless to stay and sit in the lab..restless and cursed enough to break or damage any experiment results’…and far too DESI to leave the country..I have no characteristics of a great scientist…I don’t get involved in numbers and figures,and magical solutions to complicated problems in the bathroom and I love snoring at night for hours.
And just then a voice descended which I thought was God sent; of a lady who shouted out my name aloud from the other end of the lawn…
In no time I excused myself from the league of extra-ordinary gentlemen and approached the desperate housewives…The bevy of women whom I offered a polite Namaste to… were desperate for a different reason
For quite sometime It had seemed to me that the entire universe had only one thing to say to me ever since I joined college and here it went again with Mehta Aunty ”Ohhhh…shrill how thin have you grown…Diet??? U girls today all wanting to attain size zero….how dark has your complexion become??”
The same IVRS like reponse from my side
“Ohhhh…Aunty the Goddamn MESS food is the reason for all this..raison d’etre”
This is how Sharma aunty started..words pouring out from those heavily lipsticked pout ”Arey Beta..Ditch what uncles say…A girl however bristling with degrees is incomplete if she doesn’t find a suitable match..education and ambition is fine but not too the extent that you fall short of good guys in the community…remember no guy would ever like a girl more qualified,educated or rich than him…”
“She should know to cook,sew and be polite and courteous to all and look after the house..”
God!!From frying pan to fire!!! I was better off with Uncles there,so what if it came at the cost of passive smoking and choking my lungs…
I was now in a brain haywire situation….
Adding to all this..Gupta aunty delivered the coup de grace by saying..
“Ohh dear you’ve become so pretty..and in about a year u’ll even start to work…wow!! U remember my son Mohan..yeah he’s a doctor in the army now..he’s here why don’t the two of U meet sometime..look!!he’s right there…”
SOS I messaged mom and pressed the panic button on my cell..
“DAD,you’ll have to take me out of this place..right now”
To be continued..........

EYES WIDE SHUT!

2009-03-20T22:28:00.000+05:30

often I have tried pinching myself..or asked others to pinch me
often I have tried to jerk my legs vigorously..
often I have rocketed to the nearest water point, splashed water on my face,wet my eyes
All in an attempt to remain awake in the class..

In many cases the above operations have been doomed..
What follows is..
*continuous batting of eyelids(as a tube light in a voltage fluctuation)
*the smudge like marks or the running ant like handwriting on the notebook in front of me...followed by the slipping of pen from my hand..
the handwriting turns good,bad and then ugly...and then blank....
Note the way my handwriting deteriorates..(not a drunken driving add!)

How often have you been caught stretching arms..and opening that big mouth with the annoying(to others) AWWHHHHHHHH..sound..
then find some weird muscle in your neck stretched beyond repair and paining like hell..
or even worst you find that the entire class is suddenly looking at you..making you realise..hey!whats so special abt me today!!
Assess the situation and curse yourself for sleeping or curse the external disturbing/waking agent..

The next time any one of us is nabbed yawning
in the class by the teacher..and asked "how dare you yawn in my class?"

here's what you can explain to him...
You can try to explain to your teacher"Sir I was Just yawning ,not sleeping..
The primary reason behind yawning is to control brain temperature. It cools off your brain, much like a fan cools off the inside of a computer.Also, that yawning is caused by lack of

oxygen not necessarily lack of sleep or boredom. Another speculated reason for yawning is nervousness and is also claimed to help increase the state of alertness of a person—paratroopers have been noted to yawn in the moments before they exit the aircraft."
Also tell him...that it has been established by Science that Yawning reflex is contagious and spreads.. if one person yawns, this may cause another person to "sympathetically" yawn.

Observing another person's yawning face (especially his/her eyes), even reading, or thinking about yawning, can cause a person to yawn...
So you see its not all your fault,Prof!!!nor should you be conscious or guilty or indignant that you made us yawn...

.
Pretty often you might be surreptitious in your attempts pretending to be hiding behind the book,or resting your face,hiding those guilty sleepy eyes just behind the back of your hand...when you realise that you've succeeded in fooling the prof...and enjoyed those few moments of spiritual bliss,dreaming about the best food,outfits,places,crushes in sleep..away

from all those shady free body diagarams, puzzling circuits and mystifying equations...
I have taken such "power naps" in the midst of a classical concerts...
and trust me!! also in the midst of an electrifying rock concerts.
I have dozed off in bathrooms,in the midst of telephonic conversations,meals,even face to face conversations...

Well most of the times I have been successful in my super slumbers..
but many times not...
Like in the first year when the class was held in the huge lecture hall with 120 students..people used to make a beeline for the farthest benches..read a book,spot others upto something

while I busy in SLEEP

tragedy struck when we shifted to a smaller classroom with a strength of about 60..
Diplomatic immunity as my frnd calls it is "sitting on the first bench,you can just sleep by covering your face,manoj kumar style..and go unnoticed,while prof will be busy casting a suspicious glance at the back benchers"

I guess it worked
It was just one day when I failed to sit on the first bench when some overtly strict(read:nutty) professor..whose class was always marked by pin drop silence lulled me to sleep...
Zzzzzzzzz...Zzzzzzz....
suddenly I listen to Ravana roaring..
and there he was standing with arms akimbo,like any jailor at guantanamo bay..ready to take me to task..

In reflex I sprang out of my seat to stand and save my life
The Prof asked me what he had been teaching...i glance at the board ,..clueless i muttered letters written on the board..
The next I hear is a crackling 100 decibel"GET OUT OF THE CLASS"
Man..I did something exceptionally "coool" in college..got thrown out of the class..

days continued..while I tried hard not to sleep in his class..his terror reigned...

Semester changed and so did teachers.. so I was back to my business..
On a kinder occassion a highly esteemed Prof caught me in the act
One fine day in His usual lectures..My vertebrael column was closing in from the 90 deg. to the table to 60..45..and finally approaching to 0 deg to the table
when he points me out.."and there we have someone sleeping...Tell me do I sound like your dad who probably had been a good bed time storyteller or lullabye singer to you in your hey

days???"
I just tried to figure some excuse but mumbled a sheepish apology...

He saw me sleeping in his class even after that day when he had given me his "piece of mind"...but I think he'd given up on me...
some people are just too impossible,irreparable,incorrigible....he must have thought

Its not that I am nocturnal and suffer from a sleep deficit...I have slept in class even after having 10 hrs sleep at night..
So you know its not all my fault!

I didnt much like the movie SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE but as a little girl I always fancied SLEEPING BEAUTY..
During summers you can blame the sweltering heat and the sleep inducing heat wave that keeps you confined in your nest...thus leaving you with no option but to sleep..
During rains..the weather becomes so gloomy and mundane that its hard to stay active...so sleep..
During winters its so comfortable to be wrapped us and cozily sleep..
But just a Word:
"NO Dream comes True untill we Wake Up and goto work"..
Having said that..my blog uploaded..my job done...Off I go...Zzzzzz
While you can YAAWWWNN as the blog entry ends!!

A LOT LIKE LOVE

2009-02-13T23:24:00.001+05:30

I used to trace this route everyday...returning from the public library,which was a respite for me during those days when one starts getting bored of vacations..
There was this couple whom I saw..they used to frequent the library very often..
While the girl unearthed books in those sections where i found my fiction collection,the guy kept himself busy with newspapers,history and magazine section..
At the eatery close by they would sit and devour snacks..feeding tit-bits to each other..breaking into chuckles...at times even ended fighting,slapping each other in jest......

As the road forked into two separate streets..the boy and girl parted..said goodbyes to each other..
They moved a few steps away...and turned back,to get a final glimpse of each other .
I could sense their longingness for each other...they didn’t want to leave ...
Until the guy uttered the words from a distance..”I LOVE YOU”...
She stood there smiling,frozen,blushing only to wave her hand out to him.....and perhaps became conscious of a third person observer(me) who was an eye witness to the sweet adieu...and all she could do was tap herself on her head...as if feeling stupid....All I did was gave the girl a smile............
The next time I saw them..they were sharing the same umbrella...on a rainy,windy evening...
Much as i would not have liked to look at them,The romantic in me couldn’t resist.
For the sake of vicarious pleasure I looked at them..
In a tizzy the guy was on his knees,hands folded as if praying to the girl,serenading her..
“WEIRD??? CRAZY.....FOOLISHLY ROMANTIC....”
Then why was it making me smile,and why did I not turn my gaze away from them??
Maybe that’s the stuff dreams are made of..............
Only later did the girl box his ears,and they started to walk to the fork where they parted,smiled,waved......turned and looked back at each other..again and again...

Days passed by,and my long vacation was coming to an end..
I didn’t get to see them again..
It was only a few days back that I saw them together again at a Gift Shop.....
Buying each other valentine’s gift...probably

But alas!their day will be ruined!
In a country where the vanguards of “culture” are the youth who are unemployed,and who have nothing to do.....
Honestly the only identity about BAJRANG DAL I am aware of is their protests against Valentine’s Day on the pretext of safeguarding our culture....
Awww Come’on!
Do I need to mention the Khajuraho temples were built over a span of 200 years, from 950 to 1150AD??

Don’t we know how Lord Rama won Sita’s heart or for that matter Arjun wooed Draupadi in a Swayamvar..... the Girl had her own choice even then you see!!
And who needs to tell them about the God who portrayed various roles: a god-child, a prankster, a model lover, a divine hero and the Supreme Being.Lord Krishna .The stories of his play with the gopis (milkmaids) of Vrindavana became known as the Rasa Lila.These became important as part of the development of the Krishna bhakti traditions worshiping Radha Krishna. Krishna and Radha have been epitomised by Hindu Mythology as eternal lovers...who never really married each other...
Our Indian culture in the antiquity has been liberal and very frankly open minded..
Parvati is depicted as interested in Shiva's tales and appearance from her very birth and finally remembering her last life as Sati. As Parvati grew into a young woman, she began tapas (austerities) to please Shiva to grant her wish to reunite with him. She is portrayed as surpassing all other ascetics in penance, undergoing mortifications. Finally, Shiva tests her devotion by sending an attendant or appearing himself in disguise to criticize Shiva. Untouched by the act, Parvati retains her desire for Shiva compelling him to marry her. After the marriage, Parvati moves to mount Kailash, the residence of Shiva.
Now who says that a girl and guy should tie(the knot) or else die??
So why see a girl meeting a boy as a taboo??
Why go about hitting women who are dancing in pubs??
Why go inside head post offices and vandalize it because postal department has been selling and conveying Valentine’s greetings??(Atleast that’s generating some revenue for the postal dept.)
Agreed most of us celebrate the day without actually knowing the history behind the day....
What’s the harm in spending a day of fun and frolic with the special one in the lovely spring??
Calling it a money spinning iniative by Archies,Hallmark,florists,bakeries...
We need a running economy...dont we??
So
My dear Moral police officers,custodians of “culture”..
Please use whatever sense u have left,or better seek an asylum..
Let us live in love and peace....
As for my valentine wish goes...
These lines from Beautiful Mind quoted by John Nash say it all

“i have always believed in numbers and equations and logics that lead to reason..
And after a lifetime of such pursuits i ask what truly is logic who decides reason...
my quest has taken me to the physical ,metaphysical..delusional and back...
And I have made the most important discovery of my career..most important discovery of my life...
It is only in the mysterious equations of love that analogical reasons can be found..
I am only here because of you..
You are the reason I am..You’re all my reasons...Thank you”

Ho!Ho!Ho!

2008-12-21T18:23:00.000+05:30

EVENT: MOOD INDIGO 2008(Asia's Largest Cultural College Fest)
VENUE: SJM School Of management,IIT POWAI,IC 3
DATE: 21st december 2008
COMPETITION's NAME: 'TWAS BRILLIG(CREATIVE WRITING)
TOPIC:"Ho!Ho!Ho!"
TIME:10 a.m
RULES:1)write your details,reg no.,college's name,phone no. on the postcard.
2)The creative writing entry should not extend 55 words.
3)articles,1-2 lettered words to be considered in the total count of words.
4)Multiple entries from a single participant is welcome.

ENTRY NO.1

Ho!Ho!Ho!

She ran from streets to stations,
selling her handmade creations,
shouting "Ho!Ho!Ho!" as if to boast,
the christmasness of red Santa-caps,worn in parties they host.

Then came a man who went gunning down,
everyone in that town
She asked "What you from this bloodshed gain?"
Her "Ho!Ho!Ho!" never heard again......
(55 words exactly,In wake of terrorist attacks on innocent citizens of Mumbai)

ENTRY NO.2

Ho!Ho!Ho!

Its Christmas in the air,
but there's recession and despair,
I've been fired from my job
left only to sob!sob!

I see children hosting a party,
and spring at this opportunity,
Rs 100 I get per hour,
to dress as Santa Claus in the bazaar,
"Ho!Ho!Ho!" I Scream
Is this a Dream????........
(55 words exactly,in wake of recession and job cuts)

WHEN A STRANGER CALLS......

2008-11-02T20:08:00.000+05:30

PROLOGUE
october 31st:
This is something people don't generally expect from pretty damsels in college,as these are the wonder years,
girls titivate in a bid to become the next beauty pageant winner..(atleast this is what one draws from
the movies.)
Girls turned up at 12 in the common room not to sashay and sway,dressed in attire of Dracula, Noorie ,Satan and some Pillow ghost monsters..
but to dance deviously and to mumbo jumbo to
the tunes of "du hast mish".."aaja gufaaon mein aa"
HALLOWEEN they call it in the west,just gave another of those countless reasons to act whacky
see it to believe it!

sweet november 1:
" you play cricket?"asked R
my reply"oh yeah"
"then come ,we should form a team"said R.
my reply" excuse me! i thought you just asked if I booked the tickets?"
I've not followed cricket since 2003 world cup..ever since the entire batting line up was gobbled up by the aussies in my jinxed presence.
But never mind..Inspired.."this googlied maiden decided to slip in the cricket gully and give a full toss to the game knowing fully well that she is as
blind as a bat"
well,apparently my cricket knowledge is limited to the hero worshipping by my friends.

outcome:
Guys in the audience shout,nag aloud!
the all girls team "Just Chamka" wins the league match heroinically with a misfielding from miss fielding(yours truly).

November 2(the real halloween strikes 2 days later):
As a part of our sunday fitness regime,my friend Lax asked if we could just take a walk!I ditched my plan of jogging,and joined her on our way to the sports complex.
We spot the same profs with milk cans in their hand coming down the way,discussing their usual topics"socio-political scenario of India"
The sports complex has its shutter closed as its "getting prepared for the sports event in the evening"(trust me it isn't a venue for any celebrity wedding!)
Sighing!on our way back the OC road,(also referred to as the lovers' lane).
The the picturesque landscape is breathtaking..the jungle and river on one side and the college campus on the other.
But this day was not the same..
A few paces away from the OC,near the crest,just where the serene road starts we look back as we have an eerie sense of being followed.
Lax and I look back to see a man who seem to have appeared behind us from nowhere..
The two of us gave each other strange looks,as we were disconcerted by what we saw..
we could read each others' mind which was like asking each other"Are you seeing the same thing that I am?"
We realised what we saw,enough to make a chill run down our spine.
The man was 10 feet away and a thin built,a localite tresspasser,height 5'5",wearing a blue green jacket,and pants,fiddling with his genitals.
The next moment we heard someone blabber something vaguely from behind.
The sheer presence of mind on the part of Lax,as she raised her I-POD,to catch a reflection of what was behind.
And She screamed"Shrill,he's closing in on us"
My reflex,I start running,frantically,as I think Lax too will do the same.
It's then that Lax shouts and yells"shrill stop,don't run"!
I see Lax with her arms akimbo,facing him,growling at him.
I did exactly the same.Growled like an animal at the highest possible decibels.
The stalker runs back into the wild,hopping and running,like a steeplechase sprinter.
For a minute i was only convulsing.It was then that Lax told me that he had reached barely 2-3 feet behind us with his pants down!
I could only marvel at my friend's presence of mind as she worked the self defence tactics in a jiffy.
"since the guy was not too tall and muscular,he could not have done much harm to both of us,and sprinting would not have been a good solution as the
road was long and desolate,the only way to defend would in this case be to overpower with confidence.
our immediate reaction was to report it to the chief guard as it could be averted had a guard been in sight.
the chief guard's response was "What is meant to happen will happen,it s not within our wishes,We'll station a guard there,from 6 to 7,though he's always there at that spot noon onwards"

As we narrated this account in the hostel,some of the girls shied away thinking it was a "dirty talk",while I was just indebted to Lax and was in awe of her courage.

EPILOGUE
Folks will still romanticize the OC way,I will take time to appreciate the beauty of the place.
Had we gone to our Hstl. supdt. her obvious reaction would be"Girls should not go jogging,so no more jogging on that way"
MY REQUEST TO MY READERS:
"It can happen to anyone,anytime,anywhere,SO please do raise a voice,become aware,take self defence lessons"

FANaticism

2008-10-04T18:34:00.000+05:30

What makes Pappu sardar celebrate Madhuri Dikshit's birthday by distributing sweets free of cost in Jamshedpur??MF hussain making her the theme of his paintings??

Why was Sourabh Dada forced to take the visage of a Sikh turbaned man last year during Durga Puja celebrations in Kolkata so that he goes unrecognised??

What makes Beatles,Pink Floyd legends??

What makes Shah Rukh Khan movies hit??

What makes hundreds of people sit,scream,cry outside the Kodak theatre,as the stars afoot the red carpet when the Oscar Awards are about to start??

Worse...
This incident shocked the tennis world on April 30, 1993. During a quarterfinal in which Monica Seles was leading 6–4, 4–3, a 38-year-old deranged fan of SteffiGraf, Günter Parche, ran from the middle of the crowd to the edge of the court during a break between games and plunged a boning knife between Seles's shoulder blades. She was quickly rushed to a hospital. She did not return to competitive tennis for over two years.Parche was charged following the incident but was not jailed because he was found to be psychologically abnormal and was instead sentenced to two years' probation and psychological treatment.

A personal account:

When at all,I come across him on screen my eyes pop out to scan as much of him I can...to see as much of him I can..
If there's any distant song of his playing,I feel like springing on my feet,hopping around...
Is he an Eye candy??
No...
Am I just his fan??
Dont know..
Not that I think of him day and night...
How often have we been taken over by some phenomenal ,larger than life person in our life??
A person who means a demi-God to us!!
I know all the while people have thought him to be my one obsession..
but I wont denigrate it to something like "obsession"
neither do I want to extol it to "love"...much as i would love to...
It could be an admiration..a big one..hard to explain..

This feeling that made me buy his posters...
cut out any trivia/pictures related to him from the newspapers.
I remember asking mom to buy that Filmfare issue which had special portfolio shoots of his and I still treasure it somewhere away from dad's eyes..
It made me download his uncountable pictures..
Not to mention I keep them as screensavers/wallpapers ..
It made me wait anxiously for Fridays as his movies released,even when exams were in close proximity..
I once coaxed and pestered my cable operator to air his movie,and he did,a day before my 10th board exams,and much to my parents' horror I watched it...
Then getting highest in that subject,I credited it not that much to my teachers and my hard work,but to the fact that I had seen my "HERO" a day before the exam...

I've prayed for him,celebrated his birthday,been gifted his cds' by my friends..
I am proud to assert that he has been the only On-screen star i've owed my allegiance to..
I've been loyal to him and this loyalty has only grown with time..
Back in school he became my identity,people identified me as his "FAN/some called me his AC"..
While a teacher kept a watchful eye on the love-birds in the school..she never bothered about me even though she knew fully well about my crush on him..
since his first movie when critics wrote him off for his inept acting skills..I stood by him..
I have been compared to the character of Guddi played by Jaya Bhaduri in the eponymous movie...
Friends have tried irritating,teasing me saying"He doesn't know to act"..
In defense I could only say"he's learning..."
"Isn't he too old for you,he has daughters??"
In retort"No plans of marrying him,by the way I can be a good baby sitter"
I however considered him flawless...impeccable and impervious to any criticism..
the perfectly chiseled frame,the baritone voice,the rigorous effort he put into his acting..
I have waited and watched..No Hollywood Hunk for me...Desi Rules me..
And when i went to see his latest ;that has swayed the nation and made the audience swoon..
I felt like jumping out of my seat each time he came on screen..shout for him..cheer for him..
And in the scene where he gets a tepid response from his onscreen love,even after serenading her with a beautiful song ..i was almost choked...
"What an obnoxious,heartless woman can one be"I shouted it all aloud in the theatre.
Only to be glared angrily by onlookers..

Anyways,abandoning all that SHRILLONOMICS,I for the first time spent Rs.12 and downloaded that same song and have it as my hello tune today.
At the end of the movie however,my friends congratulated me..joined me in cheeing for him.."ROCK ON ARJUN"

Someday even my spouse will know that he can only play second fiddle to this great guy we know as ARJUN RAMPAL.

**Shrill:Arjun::shrill's mom:Dharamendra

KISMET CONNECTION

2008-08-09T14:52:00.000+05:30

Even as this movie rakes "not so good" reviews(sorry for the euphemism),I certainly have no interest in naming my blog afer it..
nor am i writing a review on it..

But the only strand that can relate this movie to the blog is the actor...
Each time my Mom sees the poor cute boy on screen she utters sympathetically "poor boy,Miss size 0 dumped him..bad luck!!"
LUCK!and I aver..whose bad luck is my mom worried about ...the cute boy,the Miss size 0 or Chhote Nawab??

celebrities luck apart coming to the real frame....
one sunday morning:3rd aug.2008
Ganesha says by Mr.B. Daruwalla,(Is Mr.B. Daruwalla nicknamed Ganesha??The sole similarity between the deity and his disciple
being their tummy sizes)
Taurus:
This is a week of tensions,worries,unplanned demand and unforeseen expenses.pets children dependents,older relatives will cause anxiety.you need to cope up.your partner too does cavill at pitching in.

exasperated I venture online and make a frantic effort to log on to another(rival) newspaper website with a hope of something better for me in the offing...
eventually the rivalry between the two publishing houses pays off..

Yippey! this one was directly the opposite!
Taurus:
the tree of life an ancient egyptian hieroglyph brings satiety
and pleasure to your life as family and personal relationships come together happily.your family and professional roots are strong and
you could further build upon them with the help of your spouse.Buying and selling is gainful at present.

Come what may..im least bothered,atleast a good horoscope heals like a placebo(physical healing caused due to mental healing)
Provides a feel good factor..
But not in every case..
as an e.g. this guy's case i know who is sick and tired of the falsifying optimism he's pushed into each time he reads his horoscope...
supposed to be a true virgo..he complains how very cliched and untrue horoscopes can be..as they promise him "love in the air,companionship,romantic getaway,
candlelight dinner,happiness and harmony,relationship,spouse support" lined up each week
none of them materialise..
the obvious reason:
he's single,trying and has been waiting since a long time..Good Luck buddy!

And how often have i seen we friends in the hostel pouncing onto a single paper..
No not to see our hearthrobs!not to read comics..Naah!!not to know about the weather report and
definitely not to know about what's going on where...
but to see to what soothsayers have said for us!
one asking the other.."hey!read mine"
The horoscope horror reaches an all time high when there's an exam,viva-voce round the corner..and at times even a scuffle with one's loved one.
Remember the soothsayer warning the mighty Julius Caesar about the Ides(15th) of March!asking him to not step out to senate lest he be killed..

Or the mighty Notradamus predicting doomsday!
Panditji asking Ash to mangle her "manglik" status by undergoing special rituals to ward off the imminent danger from her married life.

Ever tried zapping through breakfast news in the innumerable news channels/radio stations??
in case you havn't.. Do.
because the early morning the news channel has tarot card readers/crystal ball witches
soaked in jarring make up that leaves my aunty wondering"how could they be perfect such a make up early morning"
I jibe.."after all they've got kismet in their hands"

But one fine thing that leaves me amused is numerology..
ok..i am shrill..my bday falls on 11 th May 19*#
I am a no.2 person according to numerology(as they say 1+1=2).
So how is my current spate of bad-luck gonna change??
i know this is how a numerologist would answer:
since its the 8th month of the year..and your birthday falls on the 5th month i.e may..
so 8-5=3...
wait untill the next month i.e 9th untill it becomes 9-5=4..and things will be just fine..
since 3 is not in accordance with your lucky number 2 so this is a bad time for you..
Had i told him that this month is turning out absolutely fantastic for me..
A numerologist's explanation would be :
absolutely..ur name is shrill..a 6 lettered name.
8th month it is...
so 8-6= 2 your lucky number..so things have to be fine.

Hmmm..does that mean i change my name to shriell(7 lettered) in the coming month??.
so that next month (9-7=2)proves lucky!
I should go ask Suniel(prior sunil)Shetty or viveik(prior vivek) oberoi that!

And have we not been mystified by luck charms??
Horseshoes,fortune cookies and mascots in the west,and of course the drawing up of "kundalis" and prescribing gems for vicissitude here..
So much so some even attributed Princess Diana's accident to the diamond rock she had on her finger at the time of her death..
on a serious note i have seen people suffering from severe depressions,and taking such silly prophecies a bit too seriously..
Kismet...Science or superstition ??
U can take your pick..call it fate or fatality...

"Fate is a term concocted by people of dim intellect to give them momentary relief during their period of trial"-Sage Vishwamitra
"The fault dear Brutus is not in our stars but in our selves "-Julius Caesar
"may be ive been at the right place at the right time"-Bill Gates
"Wait till i refer to the almanac for the auspicious launch for my next post"-Shrill

PC Gaming (Please Cease Gaming)

2008-06-30T11:47:00.000+05:30

Apologies!!Apologies!!for the long sabbatical from the blogosphere.
All, I'll say is that I was reduced to the state of a Palestinian refugee while my brother(read:world's most irritating guy)became the Israeli conscript.
And in our case the bone of contention not being the GAZA Strip,but my HCL beanstalk PC..which remained under the seizure of the conscript all the while..
Needn't mention the role of US diplomats being played by my parents who let my bro take control of this holy territory..while their constant efforts to assuage me failed..
I tried to tell them the real WMD(in this case Weapons of Mental Destruction) were the GAMES installed in the PC..so first these WMDs needed to be contraband,then should one go for the rest of the grease..
Our residence resembled some war-prone battlefield with guns firing and mortar roaring..all virtually on the PC
Down memory lane
It all started way back with the Little Master video games we had got
back then were mario,tetris and my super cool man ..the pacman.
Game cartridges and highest levels attained remained the topic of discussions in birthday parties..
And now the only conversation that is broached up in labs.,canteens,events in college and even at home is CS..CS..CS and other games like something called DOTA,HALO and what not..
while guys shouted Counter Strike i wondered how about countering this with a strike??
Not that I'm playing the Devil's Advocate:there are just a few facts I'd like to share..
Agreed that such Games provide recreation and at times can also be attributed to developing logic and skills..
But the staggering extent to which they've been lionised and are being practised in the same way,is what is the cause of concern
They seem to have become objects of obsession,insanity..
* A recent report showed that 45% of heavy video game players and nearly a third of avid gamers are in the 6 to 17 year old age group (NPD Group Inc., 2006).
*It leads to aggression and belligerent attitude the players after all that "headshot" after all that "camping in Terrorist-spon and CounterTerrorist spon".
God knows what vicarious pleasure does it give to such gamers by firing guns virtualy??The Indian Army suffers from a dearth of soldiers!why not try the real life battle?
* Many games only offer an arena of weapons, killings, kicking, stabbing and shooting.(Research by Anderson & Dill, 2000; Gentile, Lynch & Walsh, 2004).
* Over-dependence on video games could foster social isolation, as they are often played alone.Why not hit the football ground or tennis court for recreation and stop complaining about poor state of sports in the country??But no..EA Sports is a better option for such sloths..after all"its in the game"
* Women are often portrayed as weaker characters that are helpless or sexually provocative.
* Many games do not offer action that requires independent thought or creativity.
* Games can confuse reality and fantasy.
For more on Fundas log on http://www.ama-assn.org/ama/pub/category/17694.html
"ALL RIGHT LET's MOVE ON..."(CS crap again!)
so if Microsoft Xbox says "Game on"..I say "No game"

Let me start with what ROALD DAHL had to say about TV a few decades ago.
It is as true for PC/Video gaming today as it was for television in the yester years.
With all due respect to Mr. Dahl i've taken the liberty of contorting(read:tampering) his poem Television...
so let me call it
THE VIDEO GAME
The most important thing we've learned,
So far as children are concerned,
Is never, NEVER, NEVER let
Them near your Moniter set --
Or better still, just don't install
The idiotic thing at all.
In almost every house we've been,
We've watched them gaping at the screen.
They loll and slop and lounge about,
And stare until their eyes pop out.
(Last week in someone's place we saw
A dozen eyeballs on the floor.)
They sit and stare and stare and sit
Until they're hypnotised by it,
Until they're absolutely drunk
With all that shocking ghastly junk.
Oh yes, we know it keeps them still,
They don't climb out the window sill,
They never fight or kick or punch,
They leave you free to cook the lunch
And wash the dishes in the sink --
But did you ever stop to think,
To wonder just exactly what
This does to your beloved tot?
IT ROTS THE SENSE IN THE HEAD!
IT KILLS IMAGINATION DEAD!
IT CLOGS AND CLUTTERS UP THE MIND!
IT MAKES A CHILD SO DULL AND BLIND
HE CAN NO LONGER UNDERSTAND
A FANTASY, A FAIRYLAND!
HIS BRAIN BECOMES AS SOFT AS CHEESE!
HIS POWERS OF THINKING RUST AND FREEZE!
HE CANNOT THINK -- HE ONLY SEES!
'All right!' you'll cry. 'All right!' you'll say,
'But if we take the set away,
What shall we do to entertain
Our darling children? Please explain!'
We'll answer this by asking you,
'What used the darling ones to do?
'How used they keep themselves contented
Before this monster was invented?'

P.S.Ministry of Health(Dr. Anbumani Ramadoss) are you listening??

MOTHER...SWEET MOTHER OF MINE..

2008-05-10T22:39:00.000+05:30

9 months you held me in,
While I must have given you pain within,
Then on this day I was ushered out,
With a shrill cry and innocent pout.

“It’s a baby girl” you must have been told,
Your hands would have become so cold,
As you must have held me with your palms unfold,
Down your cheeks,a tear or two may have rolled.

Sweet lullaby,you would sing to me,
“Peek-a-boo..peek-a-boo”,u’d play to quiet me,
At odd hours during nights when I would scream,
You would wake up and stroke me back to dream.

Dress me for school,with ponytails neatly done in,
And scold me,when I didn’t finish the tiffin,
And listen to my teachers as they would complain,
About your little girl’s mischiefs and shenanigan.

Play an umpire to the disputes I embroiled with ur little son,
And then buy me the Barbie and the water gun,
Not informing dad,you would screen my errant behavior,
No wonder you’ve always been my savior.

Save those extra pennies,by saving on the budget,
To spend them on my dresses ,fancies and nugget,
When on any failure I would grow despondent,
You would as usual come and be the closest attendant.

You would make me mug up the multiplication tables,
help me recite the poems and fables,
Drop and take me back from my tuition classes at night,
Always keeping me under your caring sight.

Prepare those delicious dishes in a trice,
As and when I demanded as per my choice,
Give me a massage when I would be in pain,
Oil my hair whenever I felt any strain.

As time passed by,and I entered teenage,
There were moments of tension and rage,
You would scold,you would chide,
But then make peace as u knew ur girl was on a high tide.

In competition,and examination or any other strategy,
or the very recent chicken pox malady,
You’ve been God’s angel to me,
Thank you mummy..love to thee..

Even if I try …It’s impossible being as u can be..
So come what may..just want to see you happy..

LOVE-LINGO

2008-02-14T12:33:00.000+05:30

This is a story about 3 ppl..two frnz S and M who are friends since school..and J who studies in S's colg presently.
M met J sometime back and so S is a common friend..
A Chat oneday..
M: hi!
u there?????
S: hi
M: hows life......
S: haan ..bt a bit busy
M: ???
S: fine hai
M: r u busy right now?????
??????
S: ya kinda
M: mmm....going out with someone or what????????colg koi mil gaya kya?????
S: nahi re..tu bhi na..
ppl can be busy in other boring stuffs like lab journals..:(
i am just"enjoying the ride" like EVA MENDES in hitch..
M: ohhk....
hey do u get to talk to J???
S: not these days..havnt seen him in colg since many a days..
M: hey.....tell me one thing...
wot kind of guy is he???
S: very friendly..gets along well wid evry1..
but why should u be asking that?the two of u had spent some 2 months in that summer camp together..and u told me that the 2 of u have become very good frnz..
S: i think he's a good guy
M: hey....i m getting some feeling for him now days
........
S: HMMMM.....:)Oho!!Valentine's day effect??..Valentine's day is just Archies'/hallmark's marketing strategies..;)
nonetheless..go upto him and tell him
M:it isnt that easy..and what if he doesn't feel the same??
S:hmmm..commitmentphobia in guys..haha..like Salman Khan...
M:stop kidding S..
S:dekh M..(now serious)
i'll tell u smthin..
u need to know a person really well before u have feelings..
I don't think there's anything called "love at first sight"..farce..
if u genuinely like person u,whom u've known really long..u should tell the person
and i know the kind of person J is
he will appreciate it
and continue being frnz irrespective of the fact whether or not he likes u
got me?
M: hmmmm
me: waise he's a popular guy
and has lot many female frnz
it may be coz of his friendly attitude
M: i think u r right......
S: wot?
M: ohhk.....
M: actually..
wt i feel is...
S: say?
what?
M: now a days i m like him very much
we've connected really well..and have talking a talk a lot in these 10 months...
S: achha..thats the reason fr u coming online so often??;)
M: n he is very very understanding,caring guy ..we share same interests..books,movies,and practically most of the things..

S: Oh! tht could just be good friendship too..see i dunno much abt him
M: he understands me a lot..
S: ahem...but i know he's very much like us
likes talkin to evry1..no airs, no attitude..
S: ok..and if he is understanding he very much wll understand this too..
M: really.....
S: haan...
but then again u gotto think other stuffs too..
all i say is..decision is urs
M: ............what...??????

S: U need to connect really well..
and u can think of continue further..
personally time pass romance and flings don't appeal to me..like just going out with someone for the heck..
its better to stay frnz rather than promise someone something u cant fulfill..something that leads to agony for both of u later..
..now this is what i think..u may diasgree..
think about the future too..
M: nahi re
S:say"u see urself in a relationship wid him?"
ask this question to urself?
M: i asked myself lots of time...i need his presence in my life
S: waise u wont know that untill u tell him..;)
M: mmm....thanks....
S:me: friends are fr such things
hmmm..
again this was a suggestion..u better think ..
M:i think i'll tell him..
S:and evn if he doesnt reciprocate
u still shud continue being frnz..
after all u can't force him to like u..
and again..dont flow wid my advice
M: ohhhkkkk....u think he'll like me?
does he have a girlfriend????
S: dear honestly,i dunno much..
u are really good..that's why he's such a nice frnd of urs..
and regarding girlfrnd..he has friends fr sure..but dunno abt girlfriend..
M:I m the most closest frnd of him
he cares for me a lot
he is like my mind reader..
i think he too feels for me..
S: hmmm..on that note i'll tell u sumthing told by a frnd to me..it might sound deterring..but..warning u just in case.." when u like someone,there is this involuntary feeling which makes you feel that he too feels for u..that might not be the case.."..he may be just good to u because he's good to all..i'm not leading u astray but telling u something u shud know.

M...hmmmm....yaa..its too confusing yaar??..u sound really experienced..
S:sure it is confusing..and experienced coz of frnz like u..man!u ppl have made me a LOVE GURU..
M: mmm...chal then...I'll talk to him.
S: haan
gud luck
M: talk to u later....
gn....
bye
sweet dreams
S: yeah yeah..i'll dream about george clooney..;)
bye
only later did S come to know that J and M were already "set"/"going out"/"seeing each other" and that J was talking to S impersonating as M from her gtalk id..big time prank..
this is what I call Love's labour lost..

THE RUNAWAY STRIDE

2008-01-06T18:49:00.000+05:30

So the paradoxically lazy blogger is back here after a hiatus..It’s been a year of somewhat blogging..
"some" coz MY BLOGS are few in number and "what" coz u have every reason to ask me what exactly is my blog doing here..
Well Good Fellas! Thanks for pouring down your comments on my blog…(a SMILE and a gracious bow) because that’s the only way I know my blog is being trampled by bloggers here in the blogosphere.
Mind you!this is the only place where Miss Blogger eagerly waits for Guys’ to make comments ...
So the next time even if u don’t find any blog worth lauding…go ahead..put down ur scorn and dole out ur critique ..
E-blogger has empowered us all..U can make those disparaging comments as anonymous.. In which case it may be deleted or U can drop ur comments with ur name..In which case ur page will be added to My Hateable (Waiting for Internet Explorer to come up with this antithesis of My Favourites )and so have I been empowered...
Talking of empowerement..much brouhaha is raised about female empowerment these days..I am no exception to this feminist outcry..
And I did what we the fairer sex..(in my case wheatish) do with all our MIGHTY HEART…went out shopping (read window shopping).
After all Girls just wanna have some FUN..
So, in the company of my buddy(Maggi),we entered a Watch showroom.. Citizen and Omega..and other jewels.. Hmmm…priced at Rs.28000..I wondered that WEALTH is even more than my semester fees…
Shrillonomics as usual had to creep in ..28000 means I could have some 28000/1000=28 fastrack watches...
Or as my friend looks at it..28000/0.83 = 33734 panipuris..
Ogling at them was enough to satisfy our craving..
The best part of the day came when we entered a A Big Shop..
This time we had a ready plan of action.. picked 3 of the costliest and the most classiest outfits on display.. So what if we can’t empty our already empty pockets..
I was getting dressed to THRILL. A unique sting operation. hatched in my mind.
at least try the outfits..feel good...capture few pics...keep them as memento..much as tourists do when they dress up in the ethnic way at the tea gardens in Darjeeling..or at the Dal lake in Kashmir ..
And yes!thanks to nokia E50..If Van Gogh is admired for self portraits ..I should for self-photos..
Only later when I came out of the trial room did I realize there were 3 or 4 sighing ppl waiting for their turns outside the trial room..
The salesman asked..”So, Madam,which of these?”
I went point blank..”none”.
He asked with an angry scorn”why?”
Snootily this time..”Didn’t like them..”

But then there were a few things I thoroughly liked this christmas vacation..
The idea came when my parents were away from the city for a week..so I had to take to donning the chef’s toque(hat) and apron..(figurative expressions only because I don’t believe in such groundwork before cooking…after all its cooking..no campaigning!)..End result..pure HEALTH as you can see..

Caution: never judge a meal by its photo…

Take a look at these..

while I was trying to paint out subtleties of femininity..
A neighbourhood kid remarked with some WISDOM..”Hey!don’t you know to draw faces??Is that why u’ve hidden them?”..
And that’s when I asked him to get out of my face..and mumbled that catchphrase of mine..”why always me? Hope this year has more good things in hold..”

P.S:- May you be blessed with all the block lettered words mentioned above in the blog; this new year…….

CONVERSATION ON CONSERVATISM

2007-10-25T21:49:00.000+05:30

"I came,I saw but I couldn't sit and talk..."
I bet this is what Caesar would have said had he stepped his foot on the place.
So educationists here at my place BIT(Baffling In Totality/Beyond Idealized Travesty/Built In Turmoil ..choose any one you like.. you can come up with many other
acronyms) take great pride in calling themselves conservatives..
Girls and boys!!you wont be liked talking to each other publicly ,by the authorities.
No these people here wont understand that you might be great friends,or mere seniors and juniors enjoying few moments bonhomie..
And my heart aches for those love-birds,BEWARE you'll raise plenty of eyebrows..thou shalt be separated as were romeo- juliet.

Does the pedagogue even give it a thought that by not allowing the students to mingle freely it is not only dragging them into the dark ages but also killing the very purpose of the having a co-ed institution??
No..i wont carp about the obnoxious, silly In-time restriction(where in girls are incarcerated after 5:30pm during winters and 6:30pm during summers)
..no use..i might run out of digital ink print.
Nor will i like to vent my spleen on the way,we female folk are given the "special" treatment in case we want to take part in events after the in time,later locked in buses to be deported to the hostel,heads being counted,then made to sign a register in the hostel which should include details like time you step in....

No more of these gory details..or else it will arouse the same pathos in you;as it did in me after I saw Andy Dufresne,the character Tim Robbins played in Shawshank Redemption,a man jailed for no fault of his..

Here's one of the recent anecdotes..
My friends and I go to the hostel Supdt. and request her to repeal the new formulated and implemented Out time(i.e 6 a.m)as it is not practical to go jogging so late under the hot sun..
Her reply,"You go jogging,so will other girls and later even the boys come jogging after you".
Now do we laugh or lament?? ..we were just stupefied at the stupidity of the situation.
Later my friend retorted,"I wont be surprised if I come to know that the supdt's child is not straight oriented ".

So,I forewarn you...
These pictures showcase places in BIT where my friends, I,and sometimes my friends and I together have been shoo-ed off by the custodians of conservatism..the ubiquitous Guards at BIT.
My architect friends sure should consider these structures carefully...
You might stare your eyes out and strain them in an effort to figure out whether at all these pics make any sense..
Please try to convince yourself.These are places where people are technically meant to hang around and sit,chit-chatter in any normal campus(as you will see they are steps and benches)...but not here in BIT,and strictly not if you are in company with a person of opposite sex..

Who knows my blog could even serve as a link for The World's Most Amazingly Weird Places.

sample this-
one rainy day my friend lax and I sat scribbling rudiments in our notebook,outside the steps of lecture hall only to be accosted by a prof who goes on to say"Cant you find
another place to sit and study..it doesn't look good to see you sitting here" .Bemused all I could say was,"Sir,its raining heavily outside....."

No respite under the trees too..

This is what they told my friends,"yahaan baithna manaa hai/u are not allowed to sit here"...Well if not here then where??

This is what my friends were told one day by a prof,when they were talking at this place,"yahaan kya kar rahe ho,hostel jaao/what are you doing here..go to your hostel.
"

The funniest of them all...a bench where 3 of we friends weren't allowed to sit

And if you don't allow us to sit anywhere we want to...
my friends and I have a question.."yahaan class mein kaun baithna chahta hai?/who wants to sit here in the class-room?

FAR FLUNG FREEDOM

2007-08-12T13:55:00.000+05:30

Like any Saturday,I am on my way to home from college...
Waiting for the bus near the college canteen..where small boys are busy delivering snacks and eatables to the students..
I Reflect:"I thought child labour had been legally banned in our country"..

Engulfed in myriad thoughts I am able to get a seat in the 9 a.m. BIT bus.
Later an old man boards the bus,a guy on the front seat gets up and offers him his seat.
The old man is relieved..
While the young guy calls up someone(probably some friend) on his cellphone and asks "How was CHAK -DE INDIA(movie)??,I want to take my local guardians out for a movie.."
I Reflect:"Hmmm..there's still some good left here...
one may say that the Indian Film Industry is just capitalising on the independence-day fervour,but then what's wrong in it,if it allows a family to unite on a weekend,who cares even if the script is plagiarised....Are we complaining??"

I gaze out of the window of the bus and take a look at the once called mesra countryside,now transforming into yet another urban stretch.
The 40 minutes journey which once used to seem really long,now seems comparatively shorter,with the construction and infrastructural developments viz. apartments,shopping complexes,motels,schools,better roads...
I Reflect:"Skyscrapers stacking high up on illegally captured land but slums being evicted???"

While the bus enters the clustered and the traffic infested by lanes of ranchi I am left flustered at the population hurrying on a Saturday morning..
I Reflect: "With India's Chandrayaan(moon mission) in 2008,can we really think of a getaway somewhere near the "sea of tranquility",moon's famous crater.
Give peace a chance.. "

So,I get down at Reliance Fresh...
I Reflect:"Running on errands had never been so lavish an experience.
This was the same store in news a while back...because it was vandalised by green-grocers who were facing stiff competition from it...If the Govt. doesn't come up with a solution to gel retail and independent farmers/vendors..
..Wait till Wal-Mart strikes"...

I reach home to be welcomed by a shriek of joy!!
My weekly visit had never invoked such a vibrant response!!
I peep into the sitting room to see my grandfather giving Anil Kumble company in his euphoria...

Ecstatic they were(i.e grandpa and kumble)at India's stupendous performance after a long hiatus..
I Reflect: "Every cloud has a silver lining..."
Second thoughts:"There is something in this game that can make octogenarians seem adolescents."

And even while I am typing this blog...Thanks to thee poor back-up provided by my UPS.
I have been interrupted umpteen number of times by erratic power cuts..

I Reflect:"India shining???definitely to some extent...but I still cannot imagine the condition of those villagers and town dwellers who live in non-electrified places..
Second thoughts:"India taking on China to become the next superpower in a decade from now...pipe dream as of now ..
India still needs to wait for China's nod in Nuclear Suppliers' Group to get the 123-agreement going and to start off with the Indo-US civil nuclear deal.."

I switch on the television to learn about border skirmishes killing 2 Jawaans..
I Reflect:"Nothing new...Braves have always been thrown in the dustbins of history..as the country moves on"

I zap through the channels until one of the channel wishes its viewers...
"Happy Independence Day"
U Reflect:...........................................................................

SHRILLONOMICS

2007-07-06T22:27:00.000+05:30

I dont want to sound like a megalomaniac..this blog is just a defender's testimony and i dont mean to offend any person in the incidents I shall be referring to here after,
they should be taken in lighter vein...
so, after all this RED HERRING..lets get back to business.

PICK OUT THE CORRECT ALTERNATIVE..(THERE IS ONLY ONE CORRECT ALTERNATIVE)
Sneha Ranjan/Shrill is..
a)Stingy
b)Miser
c)Skinflint
d)Kanjoos(colloquially)
e)NONE OF THE ABOVE

For all those who have zeroed in on e)NONE OF THE ABOVE..
Way to go folks!Absolutely correct...SHABAASH ... I would like to explain why I am NONE OF THE ABOVE..
I am very often misunderstood when people mistake my ECONOMICAL/THRIFTY trait for the options a),b),c)and d).
So, the early memories..take me to my childhood days when my grandparents would visit us or when we would visit them..(in either case I was happy making fast bucks when they would bestow it).I used to refer those trips as BONANZA trips.
And when others would expend those bucks in the fairs(mela) eating,playing..
I would grip them in my tiny palms to go back home and drop it safely into my piggy bank.

Ohh!and while my frnz were all in awe of the so called cute and flamboyant RICHIE RICH,I admired the good old UNCLE SCROOGE of DUCK TALES fame.
I remember when the govt.had first introduced Rs.5 coins i'd started collecting it in frenzy..dreaming i'll someday make a pool of it,dive or swim in it.
Soon my GDP (Greenback Dealing Profit) went increasing and the piggy was fattened by the moolah in it..I decided to break it.
So in a jiffy,i threw it on the floor,and with a thud the coins were all spangled on the floor rolling and chiming all over!
It made me realise the shortlivedness of the fragile,clay- built Rs.5 worth piggy bank.Each time I would have to empty it and Rs.5 would simply go down in drain.
So the next time I collected money,I bought a Rs.50 worth mechanised money bank.It had an inlet to drop in money and even an outlet through which I could take it out whenever I wanted..
This way I debunked the old adage of "PENNY WISE,POUND FOOLISH".
It became"PAISA WISE, RUPEE WISER"

As a matter of fact I debunked a lot many other myths too.
If people said Mumbai was a costly place..I'd manage to go and come back after staying in VILLE PARLE for 3 days.(ok my hotel tariff and commuting expenses were sponsored).
I'd spent Rs12*3= Rs.36 on cold drinks.Thanx to all the bugging by people who accompanied me! I'd spent those Rs.36 just to prove I aint kanjoos.
That reminds me another recent incident... I took 2 of my friends out on my birthday treat to CCD.(after lot of wheeling and dealing).
They ordered 3 "COOL BLUES".
I surreptitiously gazed at the menu and started calculating..3*Rs.65=Rs.195+taxes..It would come around to Rs220 something..and when the waiter brought the drinks.It sure looked tempting..
Hmmm..maybe Rs.220 is worth it I thought.
When my frnz started sipping,I could see on their faces all those Jim Carrey grimaces ..
One of them shouted out aloud"It's abysmal".The other followed the suit.
I honestly had no problem gulping it..taught them but to no avail..they hardly sipped the drink...
After paying the cash there I was definitely not COOL but all in BLUES! I had to find another place for lunch..I took them to KAVERI restaurant.It provides 5%discount to BITians.

Well..these days I've joined the "GO ORGANIC" bandwagon ..A pouch of that delectable sudha lassi for an amazing Rs.7.
Also I've given into the "GO DESI" fad..taken to all low cal and low cost stuffs..e.gRs.6 worth dhokla,Rs.8 worth panipuri,Rs.12 worth Idlies... no Italian,no Chinese..not for love nor for money.
And my friends of late have had no reason to complain..Even in the present scenario of inflation and rising prices..when people hardly care to call others..Dont I pester and remember u fellas,each time I give u a missed call,when time I think of you???
Finally coerce you to call me back saying"Stop it,Shrill" No wonder u call me a rough diamond...
This is what I tell my frnz "I'm a low maintenance gal!"
Anyways if u've been wondering..where all the cash reserve's been going.
Well I've been saving every DIME,for some TIME.
And Its TIME I get myself a Classy Tag Heuer or may be a Longines.

WELL....MAY BE..

2007-06-19T23:36:00.000+05:30

Times change..
don't they??
4 years back i hated the rainy season coz it left me confined in the house..not being able to romp about and play with my friends in the colony..
2 years back i rued the rains..coz it was irritating to fold one's jeans..dredge through puddles tackling bags and raincoat..
finally reach tuitions to find that i was half an hour late..
But no longer...
This time i love the monsoons..
Is it because i am no longer a teenager or some other inexplicable,unaccountable, mystifying reason..???
Well may be..i dont know...
I love the sweet tickle sensation when the raindrops touch me..
I no longer mind getting drenched(accidentally)..
I love the the strong gusts of wind lashing at me,and waltzing with my hair ..and i close my eyes to relish each moment...
No wonder I've been spending long hours in my balcony or terrace..gazing at the lush green paddy fields..swaying saal trees and the long bamboo grass
and the swollen brook nestled against jacaranda trees
All this while my finger remains tucked in my current read Tears of the Moon by Nora Roberts..
I no longer fear the sudden streak of lightening snaking its way against the grey clouds,nor do i fear the ensuing thunder crackling..
So,much so when I am asked to fetch stuffs from the market I dont fuss..
Out I step with my yellow umbrella(i wish i wasn't forced to take it) in the drizzle humming "Rainy day" by Corrs...
There I see,Little Som(std.7) gazing intently at little Tina(in std.6) who's riding her bicycle,she gives him a sweet smile..
Som's mom comes out and orders him to get inside the house..he complains..bids Tina a good-bye.
Childhood sweethearts??
Well may be..I don't know.
I move on..
Just as I reach near Shiny's house, I can as usual listen to the loud music streaming through her french windows..Colonites often have branded her a nuisance..
I'll defend her today ,coz the last time I met her she confided in me that she had a crush on someone.. shouldn't a girl nursing a crush listen to her favourite "Hum Tum..."???
Or wait ...Is Shiny in love???
Well may be...i dont know.
I proceed towards Ghosh General stores ,where the shop-keeper Munna da blushes when i ask him"dada,boudi kemon achhe?,bou bhaater boudi khub bhaalo lag chhilo" ("hows bhabhi?she was looking pretty on the day of the wedding reception")
He blushingly answers"bhaalo"(good).Oh! by the way Munna da was married just a week ago..
He gives me rs.5 discount on my purchase..
Is it because i complimented his new bride??
Well may be..I dont know..
I retreat back towards home.
Horn bellowing behind me..I look back
And I see a cream coloured Maruti 800 ..slow it was..the wipers swabbing the windscreen.
Mehta Aunty was driving it,while uncle sat next to her..i wish them namaste.
Only to see Munmun ,their pet spaniel, perched on the back seat..barking back at me.
They are one of the eldest and the most respected couples in the neighbourhood.
And as I reach home thinking...
Is there something in the rains that makes us all romantic..
Well may be...I should know..

TACKLING THE TACKY TV

2007-06-03T00:26:00.000+05:30

Just when i think of snatching an early sleep,or finishing off my book(which i confess i delve into,longer than required) or listen to some good music....
The brouhaha begins..
My craving for good music is confronted with my mom's love for that insane hullaballo.
Yes,loathe it from the bottom of your heart,liver or whatever...
Our Moms and Aunts are all drawn to this farce.
Well,the omnipresent K-serials,ruling the charts all over,shooting the TRPs like never before..
Why in the world is it called a "story about every home"(KAHAANI GHAR GHAR KI)??
So will Miss KEkta Kapoor tell us how often has she seen pre-marital,extra-marital affairs,unwed mothers,illegimate children,infidelity plaguing our home and hearth???
ohh!! i just forgot to add Amnesia and that perfect face-off (plastic surgeries) too.
What a blow to our rich cultural and familial heritage!!
And longevity and life expectancy be blessed..Census and demography deptt.Check your figures please.
Five generations in a family is too common a thing to witness in our Indian families today.
Ask Miss KEkta....
Talking about multiple marriages and polygamy.
GOD!! Even my little niece who plays with her dolls hasn't married off her Barbies that many times as often as the characters in the soap operas..
All lambasting the Hindu marriage act..
Why doesn't the information and broadcasting ministry first take a strict action against this tomfoolery on the Desi TV circuit rather than banning AXN in India??
And just when you thought the Mrs.too good to be true is done with all the "tear jerking" sermons on uber sugery ethics.
Watch out!!because here comes the conniving and conspiring Chachi(aunt),with oodles of make-up,sporting those fancy bindis,heavy jewellery.All charged up, in revenge,to take away the property and berate the rest in the family.
Uffffffff.......
And thats not all,when you feel this half an hour of moonshine soap has finally slipped off from your hands for the day.
Take a break and come back to listen to all those dulcet singers,or must i say nasal screeching Music directors quarreling on the small screen.
Yeah! I am talking about the host of Music/dance competitions on TV these days..each promising to"bring out the hidden talent in" and "promising to give a break".

The final onslaught on my aural nerves comes when my neighbour Sumi(inspired by the talent hunts shows) armed with her harmonium,starts her riyaaz (singing practice)
at 11p.m.Its been a year but she still screams the same sa-re-ga-ma...
After all this...i no longer am in a position to wish mom "Good Night" these days..
Instead i am forced to scream aloud another two lettered phrase "EARPLUGS PLEASE".

EVERYBODY LOVED PRIYANKA...

2007-05-23T13:17:00.000+05:30

It was raining then.Must have been sometime during monsoons when a new girl entered the class entered..She sat on the bench in front of mine.We still didn't talk to each other for quite some days.We were studying in Prep A and I don't remember having great friends(as i have today) at that time..The only ones I had were My "little master" video game and a few elder didis in my neighborhood.Too small to understand what friendship meant.
It was after few weeks,that i came to know how verbose the girl was.She would go on and on blabbering about any thing..
We struck a good bonhomie in class 1.She lived some 3/4th km away from my house.
I remember when she had first come to my home,how excited I was.I had been waiting the entire afternoon,staring at window, waiting for Priyanka to arrive..with time both of us were really forging a strong friendship.

In class2 we would stay back in school after classes had ended doing up the Class bulletin board or preparing articles..we shared common interests..and we were made prefects and captains alternately.I must admit she was far more responsible than i was.
While I would hone my simian instincts on the yellow painted monkey-ladder or sway on the swing,Priya(shortened her name coz i found Priyanka too long) would take pleasure in combing Aaya Didi's(school's staff) tresses and tell her how lovely they were.Then she would plead to me"Sneha,come down,let us try the see-saw".
We started visiting each other's place more often as we ascended classes;for assignments,class-notes,exhibition work(she made lovely clay balls as planets when we made a model of solar system).I loved the lip-smacking pickles her mom served to me while she kept trying to ride my bicycle.She was outstanding in maths and hindi.
Once she won a local elocution competition,still never let it go into her head.I drew inspiration from her,and won it the next time.
Aahh!!The dramatics and dance that we were into..She was made Sonia Gandhi once,Queen of King Solomon(when King solomon had to bow down and propose to her,both of them were too shy to do it),a dowry demanding mother-in-law..but my favourite one remains the "Mind your Language"skit in class 6 and the falguni pathak dance we taught to the slum children.

We were both choir members and enjoyed singing together.The way she would impersonate one of our teachers in an attempt to sound very much like those high pitched opera singers...that still invites my chuckles.
Gutsy and brave she was,and would stand up against anything she felt was wrong.I remember when in class6.she saw a std.10 captain leaving the tap
at the water point open,with water spewing all over.She went up to him,though she saw he was with his gang,and questioned him"Bhaiya,you left the tap open,is it not your responsibility to close it?"The captain said"Can you see my badge,do you know who i am?"
That didn't budge her to say"You should put forth an example ,so please do close the tap."
Priya was compassionate and would helping out people.One day when one of our classmates was being teased by the rest of class guys,for no fault of his,she took up cudgels on his behalf.The rest of the guys were all put to silence by her words.She later became friends with everyone even that senior captain who would call her"Priyanka madam" in banter.She was a real tomboy and everyone started liking her.
Not that Priya and I never fought.We had plenty of tiffs between us,but very soon we would get over it and laugh at each other's stupidity.
We enjoyed those "girl talks"..I told her how i couldn't stop thinking about Hrithik after the release of KNPH and she confessed even she was nuts about Salman.
Our friendship was getting noticed by everyone.Once our Games teacher gifted us a bouquet(which was gifted to him) saying,"this one,for your friendship girls"

In Std.7 Priya lost one of her three elder brothers,to some undiagnosed illness..The loss was obviously too big for the family,so they were moving to Patna where her father worked,and where most of her relatives stayed.
I was really downcast at this thought of her leaving..I remember giving her a tight hug and a lovely showpiece while parting..she presented me a walkman(she knew how much i needed it).
Though time healed the void,that i had initially felt after she left,as i made new good friends.
But still,class periods were never the same and recess never as amusing as it used to be..
Its not that easy to stop missing one's first friend.
We always were in touch with each other..confiding those teenage secrets over the phone..she was no more the same,as she now had started giving me mature advices.

On 11th May 2 years back,my B'day,she had called me in the morning to wish,her voice was not the usual perky one,probably coz she had just got up from sleep then..and said she'd call me later..I kept waiting for that "later"..
Exactly 2 years back on 23rd May,our 12th results were declared,I kept calling her to share my frustration,as my results weren't as per my expectations..but no one picked it up.Then the other day her Father rang up to break that ill-fated,shocking news"Beta,Priyanka is no more.."
I just couldn't believe what i had heard..Then her eldest brother took away the phone from uncle,as uncle started to sob bitterly.Bhaiya said that she was fine at the dinner last night,only when they tried to wake her up the next day on 23rd,they found her breathless...
I was not in a position to ask any further.I still am not..I tried doing that on her B'day but feared what if one call of mine revokes the grief of the bereaved family.
It took weeks for the feeling to sink in,that I no longer will be able to talk to my adorable friend.
I feel eerie at the thought,how often Priya and I would end our conversation saying to each other"HASO,JIYO,GAAO,MUSKURAAO,KYA PATA KAL HO NAA HO"(laugh,live,sing and smile what if tomorrow never comes)
Today,on her second death anniversary,I just want her family to be blessed with fortitude to get on with their lives,after losing two of their lovely children...
Truly,WHOM GODS LOVE DIE YOUNG.

SMART and I

2007-05-17T22:58:00.000+05:30

Sorry folks!! If i havent been in touch with u all these days..Not at all my fault...
Here is something which will make some empathise and others sympathise with me..

How ironical!!they call themselves RELIANCE Smart.None of the 2 adjectives has been true in my case of consumerism..so spare me!!
Ever since i bought my first mobile phone it has been no less than a dream for me to talk without interruptions..never have I had a breakthrough in talking ..
Each time I tried calling someone "NETWORK BUSY" signal would flash on my mobile screen..Shouldn't there be a NETWORK to keep itself BUSY??
At least the signal"ERROR IN CONNECTION" was justified.I agree ...Yeah!!there were plenty of errors in the connection..And when,at all,I made some success in connecting with someone i would heave a momentary sigh of relief,and remark"I cant hear you. sorry can u please be a bit louder??"," Can u please come in a better network area?"
After much of the martial arts i practised near my room's window placing my cellphone in all possible directions..
The best network area that i could access was my hostel lawn..
So i would run out of my room out in the lawn..where I had to battle the cold,rain and many a times mosquitoes' army conspiring a carnage on me.
predicaments of all sorts...but still no hassle free conversation.After a few months I gave up...No point! manoeuvring my mobile and myself in all directions screaming"hello,hello" for the umpteenth time..wasting my cellular balance(pun)..and still not able to hear a word from the other side.

Friends and relatives would complain that i had turned unsociable,rude,cocky..no more bothering to exchange pleasantries over the phone.
One of my frnz scrapped me on orkut "What shrill!!after uve reached colg it seems all your calls are just being directed to one number,what no.is it??
Uve forgotten us..yaar
Wont ask u much coz i know such things do happen...All the best to u two"
GOD!!What on earth did my frnd mean??Nonplussed i was at this false accusation.
Some even asked mom if i was OK(some presumed i was under depression, or given to one of those teenage"identity crisis" fits)
The situation became all the more hopeless when my message tone beeped and hostel frnz next door would ask"So,Shrill what message is it?","Is RELIANCE asking u to download ringtones or asking u to take a look at your horoscope,coz Human beings are hardly in touch with you"
Sorry!!people..i tried my best..rang up the customer care where no one picked up the fone..wrote mails addressed to Smart ppl which they dint received ..
Then came LAN in BIT..all buddies hooked onto it..I dint have my comp in the hostel,so when my frnz were busy confabulating
and making new frnz on LAN..
I was CAST AWAY!!
At times this incommunicado feeling made me feel like a reclusive islander.
Even Robinson Crusoe had Man Friday with him..

But yeah it came with its own advantages too!!
Best part being whenever in class or labs my frnz with some other network provider, would have painstakingly take their
cell out and switch it off,or silent it..Huh!! i would shrug my shoulders in that smug pleasure and say"See,i wont need to do that..no network,no calls"
And as one of my hostel friends Gita(name changed to protect privacy) suggested;the service acts as a call filter...How come??
she explained.."look,when ure getting call from a no..u don't want to attend,just place ur cell somewhere inside your room..no network,no call,
and even if by some quirk of fate
the person contacts u; just go on..saying,hello cant hear u"
Well such a situation never arose in my case...
As of now,I m happy ;meeting all my friends this summer,making up with them,and asking them to read my blog.
LESSON LEARNT:"What LIES in the name?!";-)

2002:A Space Odyssey

2007-05-10T13:30:00.000+05:30

A girl when in std.9 always wanted this work of hers to get published in the school magazine...but the magazine didn't come out..and this text got lost,
later she retrieved this work of hers after years.. i thot of publishing it in my blog,...so give it a read please..its about her first hot air balloon flight.

The sky was painted azure,and cottony wisps of cloud dotted it.The green sylvan strands swayed in the air dancing to the tunes of the melodious,fragrant breeze.
The garment that mother nature wore was more than "just favourable" for my first hot air balloon flight.
The authorities at the airport had organised a free hot air balloon flight for students.
As the old saying goes "the early bird catches the worm",i was amongst the first few students who had turned up early in the morning probably
coz i never had the flight experience before ..I was geared up in a helmet and a leather suit(just in case smthin went wrong).
The colour of the balloon was red.It was so; to be distinct in the sobre background.An airport attendant Sheena was there to accompany me.
(She was probably there to check on my nerves and in the next 5 mins. she would become my "messiah" for life!)

"All set", Sheena told her colleague as they tested the hot air engine which emanated blazing red fumes.
In one frantic motion we got into the basket of the balloon and in a trice we were elevating and soaring new heights in the sky.Merely ten metres above I felt I was on cloud#9,but as i scaled new heights my blood thickened,heart thumped,temples pounded and
intestines went haywire...Acrophobia,i guess.I just closed my eyes.
Sheena understood that things werent fine ..Much to my relief she clutched my hand and bolstered me saying"Think ur flying..all by yourself..".
My conscience urged my mortal senses to be brave..

Very surprisingly,my belly turned red from yellow.Yes!I now was transformed from Little Miss Muffet to Joan Of Arc.
On opening my eyes I found a much friendlier Earth under my eyes.At a height of about 200 metres, I enjoyed playing hide and seek with the sun..and the clear pond beneath; served as a clear mirror for it.
There were these lush fields,with meandering brook running through them.I was not wearing my myopia correcting glasses so the aeroplanes below
resembled giant horses unable to trot.The statue of the Maharaja seemed like a frozen truant waiting for his gang members.
The cars moving up and down the street looked like mice scampering about..and the horde of students waiting below looked like ants of different species.
As the 30 mins. of this exhilarating odyssey was coming to an end..I held on to Sheena,thanking her,as we retarded our pace..The gravity pulled us down.
I now wanted to relive each moment of this flight.However when i reached the ground,i was submerged in an overwhelming feeling of reunion with my Mother..
My mother in all sense..my MOTHER"LAND"..

EARTHQUAKE@8.0

2007-04-01T15:26:00.000+05:30

"Wake up" ," Get moving"...Mon's shrill voice pierced through my ears,and i darted out of the bed....looked askance through the window and wondered why on earth was Mon
considering to jog so early...It was still dark outside; then I looked at the alarm clock(the same machine you and I set to buzz ..and still want it never to buzz, and when audaciously does so, slam it on! n then again go back to Zzzzzz..)it was only 2.30.a.m!!
Following her was Maggi, whose words shook the ground beneath my feet..she cried out loud"EARTHQUAKE'S GONNA STRIKE..Run,people!!!".
Well,I got carried away...in the fleeting world of cinema..
The Titanic plot where the sailor sees the iceberg and warns" ICEBERG ,RUN AHOY"..flashed across my inward eye..
Then Day After Tomorrow's climatic catastrophe where the scientist warns people about the snowstorm...and asks them to MIGRATE.
Hmmm..but here were we in BIT where earthquake was being forecast..interesting
I did recollect from the project work i did in geography during school a) earthquakes cannot be predicted 2) usually are nocturnal 3)Ranchi lies in the safe belt region
Nevertheless the 2nd clause was true..it was 2.30 night/morning....whatever..
so some scare was justified.
TAKE 1
So,we got the front gate of our hostel opened..and out were we in the cold..under the stars..(rare for gals at BIT).
Each of our hostel inmates was out..some rubbing eyes, some running to get out asap
Frnds advising each other not to stand near electric poles and how to go about doing this ..that..
The Best part being ppl coming out of the hostel with their prized possessions eg.laptops n mobile,GPA cards!!!(not me please)
Fellow Gujju frnz reciting their harrowing anecdotes about the quake that rocked Bhuj...resulting in great number of casualties..and i was left musing..
What if the same happens here too..
Then i appease myself thinkin "Naaa...My horoscope both in HT and TOI predicted the week was gonna be enjoyable..
I could head for a hotel but definitely not a hospital.."
TAKE 2
Waiting outside people had started to play songs on their laptops.."Kal ho naa ho","Armageddon"..and other eerie songs.
I wish I had a Laptop then...I would have preached some optimissim by playing "I M ALIVE(celine)","Brand New Day(Sting)"..
After an hour the scene became more of a picnic than a pandemonium...with people relaxin,and laughing at the stupidity who-so-ever ignited the scare..
I bet you wouldn't believe they were the same ,who were running helter skelter a while ago.
Alas!!Leave alone quake not even a tremor was felt..
"Hoax it was"..told our hostel supdt.
And then I went back to my room , slammed the door ,set the alarm to buzz at 7.30am.

N.B:-By now you must have realised that 8.0 stands for my hostel no. and definitely not richter intensity.

Newton's Ring...

2006-12-23T14:04:00.000+05:30

First things First

*This blog of mine has nothing to do with NEWTON though I love apples and am craving for an AppleI-Pod.
*I am no SCIENTOLOGY follower though I had nursed a crush on Tom Cruise.
*I am not engaged as yet, my RING finger is still empty.

Circa November2006.It was a week before the 1st end semester exams of my B.Engg. were to start, and I had been sleeping, drinking, eating, walking and talking only Newton’s ring.(a 2-3 page text in the chapter of Optical physics)
While my other hostel mates were busy delving into other extraneous subjects I was stuck up being fascinated by Newton’s ring.
Friends would ask, "how much is done for exams? ","Hey shrill, what are you studying right now?"
My resounding reply would boom in their ears "Newton’s ring, fellas."
One day a friend took pity on me and said"It shouldn’t take you so long after all its just a 3 page long text,should I help you?"
I simply No-thanked her.
.Now how on earth could I explain my new friends what a procrastinator I am!!
Not that the text needed too many grey cells to be charged,in order to comprehend its meaning.
I was just not getting ahead with it.....uuuuhhhmmmm…..
No, It (read:the text) was not getting ahead with me….probably so because I am a forced believer in the Parkinson’s law….What’s that???..
1)the observation that work always expands to fill the time set aside for it.
2)work will take as much of time as you give it.
If you thought the above meanings were too..euphemistic and obscure..
To be simple
3)not that good at time management.
Alluding to the above explanation..I had been thinking for quite some time to launch my blogsite(ooohhh!!doesn’t it sound oomphy??…...naaaa.….), until I read an article in the newspaper saying how the junta is being smitten by the blog bug,and how people get addicted to it…,how netizens develop an insanity over it…..
I thought …neither do I blog,nor do I get addicted to it and insanity will definitely be at bay(I must add I am a proud Ranchitte and the mental asylum is pretty far from my place.)

Circa December2006.I was getting bugged with life during my semester breaks(trust me too…much of feasting at times leads to burn out…) I started gazing at Blogosphere and after reading some awesome blogs written by an avid blogger...All it did was, rekindled the “I wanna blog too...” instincts in me.
Then I got obsessed with the contents of my inaugural blog,blogsite’s name,blog title and subtitle…
I would spend hours in my balcony thinking about it, thinking about it at the lunch and dinner table,during my siestas…very much like Newton’s Ring.This time Mom would quiz me,"What happened dear,you seem so lost,everything ok??”..
So many blogsite names got coined in my mind…e.g.paradoxical princess, rambling raconteur,clandestine confessions, ….until I went nuts with names as Cercopithecoid(a supposedly intelligent monkey),
and lymphadenopathy(a morbid illness)….
Then a friend suggested “why don’t you go for something simpler?”….
It took a split second for me to come with something as simple as SHRILL VOICES(pun intended)
So here I am …
A NEW KID ON THE BLOG.