KISMET CONNECTION

Even as this movie rakes "not so good" reviews(sorry for the euphemism),I certainly have no interest in naming my blog afer it..
nor am i writing a review on it..

But the only strand that can relate this movie to the blog is the actor...
Each time my Mom sees the poor cute boy on screen she utters sympathetically "poor boy,Miss size 0 dumped him..bad luck!!"
LUCK!and I aver..whose bad luck is my mom worried about ...the cute boy,the Miss size 0 or Chhote Nawab??

celebrities luck apart coming to the real frame....
one sunday morning:3rd aug.2008
Ganesha says by Mr.B. Daruwalla,(Is Mr.B. Daruwalla nicknamed Ganesha??The sole similarity between the deity and his disciple
being their tummy sizes)
Taurus:
This is a week of tensions,worries,unplanned demand and unforeseen expenses.pets children dependents,older relatives will cause anxiety.you need to cope up.your partner too does cavill at pitching in.

exasperated I venture online and make a frantic effort to log on to another(rival) newspaper website with a hope of something better for me in the offing...
eventually the rivalry between the two publishing houses pays off..

Yippey! this one was directly the opposite!
Taurus:
the tree of life an ancient egyptian hieroglyph brings satiety
and pleasure to your life as family and personal relationships come together happily.your family and professional roots are strong and
you could further build upon them with the help of your spouse.Buying and selling is gainful at present.

Come what may..im least bothered,atleast a good horoscope heals like a placebo(physical healing caused due to mental healing)
Provides a feel good factor..
But not in every case..
as an e.g. this guy's case i know who is sick and tired of the falsifying optimism he's pushed into each time he reads his horoscope...
supposed to be a true virgo..he complains how very cliched and untrue horoscopes can be..as they promise him "love in the air,companionship,romantic getaway,
candlelight dinner,happiness and harmony,relationship,spouse support" lined up each week
none of them materialise..
the obvious reason:
he's single,trying and has been waiting since a long time..Good Luck buddy!

And how often have i seen we friends in the hostel pouncing onto a single paper..
No not to see our hearthrobs!not to read comics..Naah!!not to know about the weather report and
definitely not to know about what's going on where...
but to see to what soothsayers have said for us!
one asking the other.."hey!read mine"
The horoscope horror reaches an all time high when there's an exam,viva-voce round the corner..and at times even a scuffle with one's loved one.
Remember the soothsayer warning the mighty Julius Caesar about the Ides(15th) of March!asking him to not step out to senate lest he be killed..

Or the mighty Notradamus predicting doomsday!
Panditji asking Ash to mangle her "manglik" status by undergoing special rituals to ward off the imminent danger from her married life.

Ever tried zapping through breakfast news in the innumerable news channels/radio stations??
in case you havn't.. Do.
because the early morning the news channel has tarot card readers/crystal ball witches
soaked in jarring make up that leaves my aunty wondering"how could they be perfect such a make up early morning"
I jibe.."after all they've got kismet in their hands"

But one fine thing that leaves me amused is numerology..
ok..i am shrill..my bday falls on 11 th May 19*#
I am a no.2 person according to numerology(as they say 1+1=2).
So how is my current spate of bad-luck gonna change??
i know this is how a numerologist would answer:
since its the 8th month of the year..and your birthday falls on the 5th month i.e may..
so 8-5=3...
wait untill the next month i.e 9th untill it becomes 9-5=4..and things will be just fine..
since 3 is not in accordance with your lucky number 2 so this is a bad time for you..
Had i told him that this month is turning out absolutely fantastic for me..
A numerologist's explanation would be :
absolutely..ur name is shrill..a 6 lettered name.
8th month it is...
so 8-6= 2 your lucky number..so things have to be fine.

Hmmm..does that mean i change my name to shriell(7 lettered) in the coming month??.
so that next month (9-7=2)proves lucky!
I should go ask Suniel(prior sunil)Shetty or viveik(prior vivek) oberoi that!

And have we not been mystified by luck charms??
Horseshoes,fortune cookies and mascots in the west,and of course the drawing up of "kundalis" and prescribing gems for vicissitude here..
So much so some even attributed Princess Diana's accident to the diamond rock she had on her finger at the time of her death..
on a serious note i have seen people suffering from severe depressions,and taking such silly prophecies a bit too seriously..
Kismet...Science or superstition ??
U can take your pick..call it fate or fatality...

"Fate is a term concocted by people of dim intellect to give them momentary relief during their period of trial"-Sage Vishwamitra
"The fault dear Brutus is not in our stars but in our selves "-Julius Caesar
"may be ive been at the right place at the right time"-Bill Gates
"Wait till i refer to the almanac for the auspicious launch for my next post"-Shrill

PC Gaming (Please Cease Gaming)

Apologies!!Apologies!!for the long sabbatical from the blogosphere.
All, I'll say is that I was reduced to the state of a Palestinian refugee while my brother(read:world's most irritating guy)became the Israeli conscript.
And in our case the bone of contention not being the GAZA Strip,but my HCL beanstalk PC..which remained under the seizure of the conscript all the while..
Needn't mention the role of US diplomats being played by my parents who let my bro take control of this holy territory..while their constant efforts to assuage me failed..
I tried to tell them the real WMD(in this case Weapons of Mental Destruction) were the GAMES installed in the PC..so first these WMDs needed to be contraband,then should one go for the rest of the grease..
Our residence resembled some war-prone battlefield with guns firing and mortar roaring..all virtually on the PC
Down memory lane
It all started way back with the Little Master video games we had got
back then were mario,tetris and my super cool man ..the pacman.
Game cartridges and highest levels attained remained the topic of discussions in birthday parties..
And now the only conversation that is broached up in labs.,canteens,events in college and even at home is CS..CS..CS and other games like something called DOTA,HALO and what not..
while guys shouted Counter Strike i wondered how about countering this with a strike??
Not that I'm playing the Devil's Advocate:there are just a few facts I'd like to share..
Agreed that such Games provide recreation and at times can also be attributed to developing logic and skills..
But the staggering extent to which they've been lionised and are being practised in the same way,is what is the cause of concern
They seem to have become objects of obsession,insanity..
* A recent report showed that 45% of heavy video game players and nearly a third of avid gamers are in the 6 to 17 year old age group (NPD Group Inc., 2006).
*It leads to aggression and belligerent attitude the players after all that "headshot" after all that "camping in Terrorist-spon and CounterTerrorist spon".
God knows what vicarious pleasure does it give to such gamers by firing guns virtualy??The Indian Army suffers from a dearth of soldiers!why not try the real life battle?
* Many games only offer an arena of weapons, killings, kicking, stabbing and shooting.(Research by Anderson & Dill, 2000; Gentile, Lynch & Walsh, 2004).
* Over-dependence on video games could foster social isolation, as they are often played alone.Why not hit the football ground or tennis court for recreation and stop complaining about poor state of sports in the country??But no..EA Sports is a better option for such sloths..after all"its in the game"
* Women are often portrayed as weaker characters that are helpless or sexually provocative.
* Many games do not offer action that requires independent thought or creativity.
* Games can confuse reality and fantasy.
For more on Fundas log on http://www.ama-assn.org/ama/pub/category/17694.html
"ALL RIGHT LET's MOVE ON..."(CS crap again!)
so if Microsoft Xbox says "Game on"..I say "No game"

Let me start with what ROALD DAHL had to say about TV a few decades ago.
It is as true for PC/Video gaming today as it was for television in the yester years.
With all due respect to Mr. Dahl i've taken the liberty of contorting(read:tampering) his poem Television...
so let me call it
THE VIDEO GAME
The most important thing we've learned,
So far as children are concerned,
Is never, NEVER, NEVER let
Them near your Moniter set --
Or better still, just don't install
The idiotic thing at all.
In almost every house we've been,
We've watched them gaping at the screen.
They loll and slop and lounge about,
And stare until their eyes pop out.
(Last week in someone's place we saw
A dozen eyeballs on the floor.)
They sit and stare and stare and sit
Until they're hypnotised by it,
Until they're absolutely drunk
With all that shocking ghastly junk.
Oh yes, we know it keeps them still,
They don't climb out the window sill,
They never fight or kick or punch,
They leave you free to cook the lunch
And wash the dishes in the sink --
But did you ever stop to think,
To wonder just exactly what
This does to your beloved tot?
IT ROTS THE SENSE IN THE HEAD!
IT KILLS IMAGINATION DEAD!
IT CLOGS AND CLUTTERS UP THE MIND!
IT MAKES A CHILD SO DULL AND BLIND
HE CAN NO LONGER UNDERSTAND
A FANTASY, A FAIRYLAND!
HIS BRAIN BECOMES AS SOFT AS CHEESE!
HIS POWERS OF THINKING RUST AND FREEZE!
HE CANNOT THINK -- HE ONLY SEES!
'All right!' you'll cry. 'All right!' you'll say,
'But if we take the set away,
What shall we do to entertain
Our darling children? Please explain!'
We'll answer this by asking you,
'What used the darling ones to do?
'How used they keep themselves contented
Before this monster was invented?'

P.S.Ministry of Health(Dr. Anbumani Ramadoss) are you listening??

MOTHER...SWEET MOTHER OF MINE..

9 months you held me in,
While I must have given you pain within,
Then on this day I was ushered out,
With a shrill cry and innocent pout.


“It’s a baby girl” you must have been told,
Your hands would have become so cold,
As you must have held me with your palms unfold,
Down your cheeks,a tear or two may have rolled.

Sweet lullaby,you would sing to me,
“Peek-a-boo..peek-a-boo”,u’d play to quiet me,
At odd hours during nights when I would scream,
You would wake up and stroke me back to dream.

Dress me for school,with ponytails neatly done in,
And scold me,when I didn’t finish the tiffin,
And listen to my teachers as they would complain,
About your little girl’s mischiefs and shenanigan.

Play an umpire to the disputes I embroiled with ur little son,
And then buy me the Barbie and the water gun,
Not informing dad,you would screen my errant behavior,
No wonder you’ve always been my savior.

Save those extra pennies,by saving on the budget,
To spend them on my dresses ,fancies and nugget,
When on any failure I would grow despondent,
You would as usual come and be the closest attendant.

You would make me mug up the multiplication tables,
help me recite the poems and fables,
Drop and take me back from my tuition classes at night,
Always keeping me under your caring sight.

Prepare those delicious dishes in a trice,
As and when I demanded as per my choice,
Give me a massage when I would be in pain,
Oil my hair whenever I felt any strain.

As time passed by,and I entered teenage,
There were moments of tension and rage,
You would scold,you would chide,
But then make peace as u knew ur girl was on a high tide.

In competition,and examination or any other strategy,
or the very recent chicken pox malady,
You’ve been God’s angel to me,
Thank you mummy..love to thee..


Even if I try …It’s impossible being as u can be..
So come what may..just want to see you happy..

LOVE-LINGO

This is a story about 3 ppl..two frnz S and M who are friends since school..and J who studies in S's colg presently.
M met J sometime back and so S is a common friend..
A Chat oneday..
M: hi!
u there?????
S: hi
M: hows life......
S: haan ..bt a bit busy
M: ???
S: fine hai
M: r u busy right now?????
??????
S: ya kinda
M: mmm....going out with someone or what????????colg koi mil gaya kya?????
S: nahi re..tu bhi na..
ppl can be busy in other boring stuffs like lab journals..:(
i am just"enjoying the ride" like EVA MENDES in hitch..
M: ohhk....
hey do u get to talk to J???
S: not these days..havnt seen him in colg since many a days..
M: hey.....tell me one thing...
wot kind of guy is he???
S: very friendly..gets along well wid evry1..
but why should u be asking that?the two of u had spent some 2 months in that summer camp together..and u told me that the 2 of u have become very good frnz..
S: i think he's a good guy
M: hey....i m getting some feeling for him now days
........
S: HMMMM.....:)Oho!!Valentine's day effect??..Valentine's day is just Archies'/hallmark's marketing strategies..;)
nonetheless..go upto him and tell him
M:it isnt that easy..and what if he doesn't feel the same??
S:hmmm..commitmentphobia in guys..haha..like Salman Khan...
M:stop kidding S..
S:dekh M..(now serious)
i'll tell u smthin..
u need to know a person really well before u have feelings..
I don't think there's anything called "love at first sight"..farce..
if u genuinely like person u,whom u've known really long..u should tell the person
and i know the kind of person J is
he will appreciate it
and continue being frnz irrespective of the fact whether or not he likes u
got me?
M: hmmmm
me: waise he's a popular guy
and has lot many female frnz
it may be coz of his friendly attitude
M: i think u r right......
S: wot?
M: ohhk.....
M: actually..
wt i feel is...
S: say?
what?
M: now a days i m like him very much
we've connected really well..and have talking a talk a lot in these 10 months...
S: achha..thats the reason fr u coming online so often??;)
M: n he is very very understanding,caring guy ..we share same interests..books,movies,and practically most of the things..

S: Oh! tht could just be good friendship too..see i dunno much abt him
M: he understands me a lot..
S: ahem...but i know he's very much like us
likes talkin to evry1..no airs, no attitude..
S: ok..and if he is understanding he very much wll understand this too..
M: really.....
S: haan...
but then again u gotto think other stuffs too..
all i say is..decision is urs
M: ............what...??????

S: U need to connect really well..
and u can think of continue further..
personally time pass romance and flings don't appeal to me..like just going out with someone for the heck..
its better to stay frnz rather than promise someone something u cant fulfill..something that leads to agony for both of u later..
..now this is what i think..u may diasgree..
think about the future too..
M: nahi re
S:say"u see urself in a relationship wid him?"
ask this question to urself?
M: i asked myself lots of time...i need his presence in my life
S: waise u wont know that untill u tell him..;)
M: mmm....thanks....
S:me: friends are fr such things
hmmm..
again this was a suggestion..u better think ..
M:i think i'll tell him..
S:and evn if he doesnt reciprocate
u still shud continue being frnz..
after all u can't force him to like u..
and again..dont flow wid my advice
M: ohhhkkkk....u think he'll like me?
does he have a girlfriend????
S: dear honestly,i dunno much..
u are really good..that's why he's such a nice frnd of urs..
and regarding girlfrnd..he has friends fr sure..but dunno abt girlfriend..
M:I m the most closest frnd of him
he cares for me a lot
he is like my mind reader..
i think he too feels for me..
S: hmmm..on that note i'll tell u sumthing told by a frnd to me..it might sound deterring..but..warning u just in case.." when u like someone,there is this involuntary feeling which makes you feel that he too feels for u..that might not be the case.."..he may be just good to u because he's good to all..i'm not leading u astray but telling u something u shud know.

M...hmmmm....yaa..its too confusing yaar??..u sound really experienced..
S:sure it is confusing..and experienced coz of frnz like u..man!u ppl have made me a LOVE GURU..
M: mmm...chal then...I'll talk to him.
S: haan
gud luck
M: talk to u later....
gn....
bye
sweet dreams
S: yeah yeah..i'll dream about george clooney..;)
bye
only later did S come to know that J and M were already "set"/"going out"/"seeing each other" and that J was talking to S impersonating as M from her gtalk id..big time prank..
this is what I call Love's labour lost..

THE RUNAWAY STRIDE

So the paradoxically lazy blogger is back here after a hiatus..It’s been a year of somewhat blogging..
"some" coz MY BLOGS are few in number and "what" coz u have every reason to ask me what exactly is my blog doing here..
Well Good Fellas! Thanks for pouring down your comments on my blog…(a SMILE and a gracious bow) because that’s the only way I know my blog is being trampled by bloggers here in the blogosphere.
Mind you!this is the only place where Miss Blogger eagerly waits for Guys’ to make comments ...
So the next time even if u don’t find any blog worth lauding…go ahead..put down ur scorn and dole out ur critique ..
E-blogger has empowered us all..U can make those disparaging comments as anonymous.. In which case it may be deleted or U can drop ur comments with ur name..In which case ur page will be added to My Hateable (Waiting for Internet Explorer to come up with this antithesis of My Favourites )and so have I been empowered...
Talking of empowerement..much brouhaha is raised about female empowerment these days..I am no exception to this feminist outcry..
And I did what we the fairer sex..(in my case wheatish) do with all our MIGHTY HEART…went out shopping (read window shopping).
After all Girls just wanna have some FUN..
So, in the company of my buddy(Maggi),we entered a Watch showroom.. Citizen and Omega..and other jewels.. Hmmm…priced at Rs.28000..I wondered that WEALTH is even more than my semester fees…
Shrillonomics as usual had to creep in ..28000 means I could have some 28000/1000=28 fastrack watches...
Or as my friend looks at it..28000/0.83 = 33734 panipuris..
Ogling at them was enough to satisfy our craving..
The best part of the day came when we entered a A Big Shop..
This time we had a ready plan of action.. picked 3 of the costliest and the most classiest outfits on display.. So what if we can’t empty our already empty pockets..
I was getting dressed to THRILL. A unique sting operation. hatched in my mind.
at least try the outfits..feel good...capture few pics...keep them as memento..much as tourists do when they dress up in the ethnic way at the tea gardens in Darjeeling..or at the Dal lake in Kashmir ..
And yes!thanks to nokia E50..If Van Gogh is admired for self portraits ..I should for self-photos..
Only later when I came out of the trial room did I realize there were 3 or 4 sighing ppl waiting for their turns outside the trial room..
The salesman asked..”So, Madam,which of these?”
I went point blank..”none”.
He asked with an angry scorn”why?”
Snootily this time..”Didn’t like them..”

But then there were a few things I thoroughly liked this christmas vacation..
The idea came when my parents were away from the city for a week..so I had to take to donning the chef’s toque(hat) and apron..(figurative expressions only because I don’t believe in such groundwork before cooking…after all its cooking..no campaigning!)..End result..pure HEALTH as you can see..



Caution: never judge a meal by its photo…

Take a look at these..






while I was trying to paint out subtleties of femininity..
A neighbourhood kid remarked with some WISDOM..”Hey!don’t you know to draw faces??Is that why u’ve hidden them?”..
And that’s when I asked him to get out of my face..and mumbled that catchphrase of mine..”why always me? Hope this year has more good things in hold..”

P.S:- May you be blessed with all the block lettered words mentioned above in the blog; this new year…….

CONVERSATION ON CONSERVATISM

"I came,I saw but I couldn't sit and talk..."
I bet this is what Caesar would have said had he stepped his foot on the place.
So educationists here at my place BIT(Baffling In Totality/Beyond Idealized Travesty/Built In Turmoil ..choose any one you like.. you can come up with many other
acronyms) take great pride in calling themselves conservatives..
Girls and boys!!you wont be liked talking to each other publicly ,by the authorities.
No these people here wont understand that you might be great friends,or mere seniors and juniors enjoying few moments bonhomie..
And my heart aches for those love-birds,BEWARE you'll raise plenty of eyebrows..thou shalt be separated as were romeo- juliet.

Does the pedagogue even give it a thought that by not allowing the students to mingle freely it is not only dragging them into the dark ages but also killing the very purpose of the having a co-ed institution??
No..i wont carp about the obnoxious, silly In-time restriction(where in girls are incarcerated after 5:30pm during winters and 6:30pm during summers)
..no use..i might run out of digital ink print.
Nor will i like to vent my spleen on the way,we female folk are given the "special" treatment in case we want to take part in events after the in time,later locked in buses to be deported to the hostel,heads being counted,then made to sign a register in the hostel which should include details like time you step in....

No more of these gory details..or else it will arouse the same pathos in you;as it did in me after I saw Andy Dufresne,the character Tim Robbins played in Shawshank Redemption,a man jailed for no fault of his..

Here's one of the recent anecdotes..
My friends and I go to the hostel Supdt. and request her to repeal the new formulated and implemented Out time(i.e 6 a.m)as it is not practical to go jogging so late under the hot sun..
Her reply,"You go jogging,so will other girls and later even the boys come jogging after you".
Now do we laugh or lament?? ..we were just stupefied at the stupidity of the situation.
Later my friend retorted,"I wont be surprised if I come to know that the supdt's child is not straight oriented ".


So,I forewarn you...
These pictures showcase places in BIT where my friends, I,and sometimes my friends and I together have been shoo-ed off by the custodians of conservatism..the ubiquitous Guards at BIT.
My architect friends sure should consider these structures carefully...
You might stare your eyes out and strain them in an effort to figure out whether at all these pics make any sense..
Please try to convince yourself.These are places where people are technically meant to hang around and sit,chit-chatter in any normal campus(as you will see they are steps and benches)...but not here in BIT,and strictly not if you are in company with a person of opposite sex..

Who knows my blog could even serve as a link for The World's Most Amazingly Weird Places.


sample this-
one rainy day my friend lax and I sat scribbling rudiments in our notebook,outside the steps of lecture hall only to be accosted by a prof who goes on to say"Cant you find
another place to sit and study..it doesn't look good to see you sitting here" .Bemused all I could say was,"Sir,its raining heavily outside....."



No respite under the trees too..

This is what they told my friends,"yahaan baithna manaa hai/u are not allowed to sit here"...Well if not here then where??






This is what my friends were told one day by a prof,when they were talking at this place,"yahaan kya kar rahe ho,hostel jaao/what are you doing here..go to your hostel.
"


The funniest of them all...a bench where 3 of we friends weren't allowed to sit

And if you don't allow us to sit anywhere we want to...
my friends and I have a question.."yahaan class mein kaun baithna chahta hai?/who wants to sit here in the class-room?

FAR FLUNG FREEDOM

Like any Saturday,I am on my way to home from college...
Waiting for the bus near the college canteen..where small boys are busy delivering snacks and eatables to the students..
I Reflect:"I thought child labour had been legally banned in our country"..

Engulfed in myriad thoughts I am able to get a seat in the 9 a.m. BIT bus.
Later an old man boards the bus,a guy on the front seat gets up and offers him his seat.
The old man is relieved..
While the young guy calls up someone(probably some friend) on his cellphone and asks "How was CHAK -DE INDIA(movie)??,I want to take my local guardians out for a movie.."
I Reflect:"Hmmm..there's still some good left here...
one may say that the Indian Film Industry is just capitalising on the independence-day fervour,but then what's wrong in it,if it allows a family to unite on a weekend,who cares even if the script is plagiarised....Are we complaining??"

I gaze out of the window of the bus and take a look at the once called mesra countryside,now transforming into yet another urban stretch.
The 40 minutes journey which once used to seem really long,now seems comparatively shorter,with the construction and infrastructural developments viz. apartments,shopping complexes,motels,schools,better roads...
I Reflect:"Skyscrapers stacking high up on illegally captured land but slums being evicted???"

While the bus enters the clustered and the traffic infested by lanes of ranchi I am left flustered at the population hurrying on a Saturday morning..
I Reflect: "With India's Chandrayaan(moon mission) in 2008,can we really think of a getaway somewhere near the "sea of tranquility",moon's famous crater.
Give peace a chance.. "

So,I get down at Reliance Fresh...
I Reflect:"Running on errands had never been so lavish an experience.
This was the same store in news a while back...because it was vandalised by green-grocers who were facing stiff competition from it...If the Govt. doesn't come up with a solution to gel retail and independent farmers/vendors..
..Wait till Wal-Mart strikes"...

I reach home to be welcomed by a shriek of joy!!
My weekly visit had never invoked such a vibrant response!!
I peep into the sitting room to see my grandfather giving Anil Kumble company in his euphoria...

Ecstatic they were(i.e grandpa and kumble)at India's stupendous performance after a long hiatus..
I Reflect: "Every cloud has a silver lining..."
Second thoughts:"There is something in this game that can make octogenarians seem adolescents."

And even while I am typing this blog...Thanks to thee poor back-up provided by my UPS.
I have been interrupted umpteen number of times by erratic power cuts..

I Reflect:"India shining???definitely to some extent...but I still cannot imagine the condition of those villagers and town dwellers who live in non-electrified places..
Second thoughts:"India taking on China to become the next superpower in a decade from now...pipe dream as of now ..
India still needs to wait for China's nod in Nuclear Suppliers' Group to get the 123-agreement going and to start off with the Indo-US civil nuclear deal.."

I switch on the television to learn about border skirmishes killing 2 Jawaans..
I Reflect:"Nothing new...Braves have always been thrown in the dustbins of history..as the country moves on"

I zap through the channels until one of the channel wishes its viewers...
"Happy Independence Day"
U Reflect:...........................................................................

SHRILLONOMICS

I dont want to sound like a megalomaniac..this blog is just a defender's testimony and i dont mean to offend any person in the incidents I shall be referring to here after,
they should be taken in lighter vein...
so, after all this RED HERRING..lets get back to business.

PICK OUT THE CORRECT ALTERNATIVE..(THERE IS ONLY ONE CORRECT ALTERNATIVE)
Sneha Ranjan/Shrill is..
a)Stingy
b)Miser
c)Skinflint
d)Kanjoos(colloquially)
e)NONE OF THE ABOVE

For all those who have zeroed in on e)NONE OF THE ABOVE..
Way to go folks!Absolutely correct...SHABAASH ... I would like to explain why I am NONE OF THE ABOVE..
I am very often misunderstood when people mistake my ECONOMICAL/THRIFTY trait for the options a),b),c)and d).
So, the early memories..take me to my childhood days when my grandparents would visit us or when we would visit them..(in either case I was happy making fast bucks when they would bestow it).I used to refer those trips as BONANZA trips.
And when others would expend those bucks in the fairs(mela) eating,playing..
I would grip them in my tiny palms to go back home and drop it safely into my piggy bank.

Ohh!and while my frnz were all in awe of the so called cute and flamboyant RICHIE RICH,I admired the good old UNCLE SCROOGE of DUCK TALES fame.
I remember when the govt.had first introduced Rs.5 coins i'd started collecting it in frenzy..dreaming i'll someday make a pool of it,dive or swim in it.
Soon my GDP (Greenback Dealing Profit) went increasing and the piggy was fattened by the moolah in it..I decided to break it.
So in a jiffy,i threw it on the floor,and with a thud the coins were all spangled on the floor rolling and chiming all over!
It made me realise the shortlivedness of the fragile,clay- built Rs.5 worth piggy bank.Each time I would have to empty it and Rs.5 would simply go down in drain.
So the next time I collected money,I bought a Rs.50 worth mechanised money bank.It had an inlet to drop in money and even an outlet through which I could take it out whenever I wanted..
This way I debunked the old adage of "PENNY WISE,POUND FOOLISH".
It became"PAISA WISE, RUPEE WISER"

As a matter of fact I debunked a lot many other myths too.
If people said Mumbai was a costly place..I'd manage to go and come back after staying in VILLE PARLE for 3 days.(ok my hotel tariff and commuting expenses were sponsored).
I'd spent Rs12*3= Rs.36 on cold drinks.Thanx to all the bugging by people who accompanied me! I'd spent those Rs.36 just to prove I aint kanjoos.
That reminds me another recent incident... I took 2 of my friends out on my birthday treat to CCD.(after lot of wheeling and dealing).
They ordered 3 "COOL BLUES".
I surreptitiously gazed at the menu and started calculating..3*Rs.65=Rs.195+taxes..It would come around to Rs220 something..and when the waiter brought the drinks.It sure looked tempting..
Hmmm..maybe Rs.220 is worth it I thought.
When my frnz started sipping,I could see on their faces all those Jim Carrey grimaces ..
One of them shouted out aloud"It's abysmal".The other followed the suit.
I honestly had no problem gulping it..taught them but to no avail..they hardly sipped the drink...
After paying the cash there I was definitely not COOL but all in BLUES! I had to find another place for lunch..I took them to KAVERI restaurant.It provides 5%discount to BITians.

Well..these days I've joined the "GO ORGANIC" bandwagon ..A pouch of that delectable sudha lassi for an amazing Rs.7.
Also I've given into the "GO DESI" fad..taken to all low cal and low cost stuffs..e.gRs.6 worth dhokla,Rs.8 worth panipuri,Rs.12 worth Idlies... no Italian,no Chinese..not for love nor for money.
And my friends of late have had no reason to complain..Even in the present scenario of inflation and rising prices..when people hardly care to call others..Dont I pester and remember u fellas,each time I give u a missed call,when time I think of you???
Finally coerce you to call me back saying"Stop it,Shrill" No wonder u call me a rough diamond...
This is what I tell my frnz "I'm a low maintenance gal!"
Anyways if u've been wondering..where all the cash reserve's been going.
Well I've been saving every DIME,for some TIME.
And Its TIME I get myself a Classy Tag Heuer or may be a Longines.

WELL....MAY BE..

Times change..
don't they??
4 years back i hated the rainy season coz it left me confined in the house..not being able to romp about and play with my friends in the colony..
2 years back i rued the rains..coz it was irritating to fold one's jeans..dredge through puddles tackling bags and raincoat..
finally reach tuitions to find that i was half an hour late..
But no longer...
This time i love the monsoons..
Is it because i am no longer a teenager or some other inexplicable,unaccountable, mystifying reason..???
Well may be..i dont know...
I love the sweet tickle sensation when the raindrops touch me..
I no longer mind getting drenched(accidentally)..
I love the the strong gusts of wind lashing at me,and waltzing with my hair ..and i close my eyes to relish each moment...
No wonder I've been spending long hours in my balcony or terrace..gazing at the lush green paddy fields..swaying saal trees and the long bamboo grass
and the swollen brook nestled against jacaranda trees
All this while my finger remains tucked in my current read Tears of the Moon by Nora Roberts..
I no longer fear the sudden streak of lightening snaking its way against the grey clouds,nor do i fear the ensuing thunder crackling..
So,much so when I am asked to fetch stuffs from the market I dont fuss..
Out I step with my yellow umbrella(i wish i wasn't forced to take it) in the drizzle humming "Rainy day" by Corrs...
There I see,Little Som(std.7) gazing intently at little Tina(in std.6) who's riding her bicycle,she gives him a sweet smile..
Som's mom comes out and orders him to get inside the house..he complains..bids Tina a good-bye.
Childhood sweethearts??
Well may be..I don't know.
I move on..
Just as I reach near Shiny's house, I can as usual listen to the loud music streaming through her french windows..Colonites often have branded her a nuisance..
I'll defend her today ,coz the last time I met her she confided in me that she had a crush on someone.. shouldn't a girl nursing a crush listen to her favourite "Hum Tum..."???
Or wait ...Is Shiny in love???
Well may be...i dont know.
I proceed towards Ghosh General stores ,where the shop-keeper Munna da blushes when i ask him"dada,boudi kemon achhe?,bou bhaater boudi khub bhaalo lag chhilo" ("hows bhabhi?she was looking pretty on the day of the wedding reception")
He blushingly answers"bhaalo"(good).Oh! by the way Munna da was married just a week ago..
He gives me rs.5 discount on my purchase..
Is it because i complimented his new bride??
Well may be..I dont know..
I retreat back towards home.
Horn bellowing behind me..I look back
And I see a cream coloured Maruti 800 ..slow it was..the wipers swabbing the windscreen.
Mehta Aunty was driving it,while uncle sat next to her..i wish them namaste.
Only to see Munmun ,their pet spaniel, perched on the back seat..barking back at me.
They are one of the eldest and the most respected couples in the neighbourhood.
And as I reach home thinking...
Is there something in the rains that makes us all romantic..
Well may be...I should know..

TACKLING THE TACKY TV

Just when i think of snatching an early sleep,or finishing off my book(which i confess i delve into,longer than required) or listen to some good music....
The brouhaha begins..
My craving for good music is confronted with my mom's love for that insane hullaballo.
Yes,loathe it from the bottom of your heart,liver or whatever...
Our Moms and Aunts are all drawn to this farce.
Well,the omnipresent K-serials,ruling the charts all over,shooting the TRPs like never before..
Why in the world is it called a "story about every home"(KAHAANI GHAR GHAR KI)??
So will Miss KEkta Kapoor tell us how often has she seen pre-marital,extra-marital affairs,unwed mothers,illegimate children,infidelity plaguing our home and hearth???
ohh!! i just forgot to add Amnesia and that perfect face-off (plastic surgeries) too.
What a blow to our rich cultural and familial heritage!!
And longevity and life expectancy be blessed..Census and demography deptt.Check your figures please.
Five generations in a family is too common a thing to witness in our Indian families today.
Ask Miss KEkta....
Talking about multiple marriages and polygamy.
GOD!! Even my little niece who plays with her dolls hasn't married off her Barbies that many times as often as the characters in the soap operas..
All lambasting the Hindu marriage act..
Why doesn't the information and broadcasting ministry first take a strict action against this tomfoolery on the Desi TV circuit rather than banning AXN in India??
And just when you thought the Mrs.too good to be true is done with all the "tear jerking" sermons on uber sugery ethics.
Watch out!!because here comes the conniving and conspiring Chachi(aunt),with oodles of make-up,sporting those fancy bindis,heavy jewellery.All charged up, in revenge,to take away the property and berate the rest in the family.
Uffffffff.......
And thats not all,when you feel this half an hour of moonshine soap has finally slipped off from your hands for the day.
Take a break and come back to listen to all those dulcet singers,or must i say nasal screeching Music directors quarreling on the small screen.
Yeah! I am talking about the host of Music/dance competitions on TV these days..each promising to"bring out the hidden talent in" and "promising to give a break".

The final onslaught on my aural nerves comes when my neighbour Sumi(inspired by the talent hunts shows) armed with her harmonium,starts her riyaaz (singing practice)
at 11p.m.Its been a year but she still screams the same sa-re-ga-ma...
After all this...i no longer am in a position to wish mom "Good Night" these days..
Instead i am forced to scream aloud another two lettered phrase "EARPLUGS PLEASE".

EVERYBODY LOVED PRIYANKA...

It was raining then.Must have been sometime during monsoons when a new girl entered the class entered..She sat on the bench in front of mine.We still didn't talk to each other for quite some days.We were studying in Prep A and I don't remember having great friends(as i have today) at that time..The only ones I had were My "little master" video game and a few elder didis in my neighborhood.Too small to understand what friendship meant.
It was after few weeks,that i came to know how verbose the girl was.She would go on and on blabbering about any thing..
We struck a good bonhomie in class 1.She lived some 3/4th km away from my house.
I remember when she had first come to my home,how excited I was.I had been waiting the entire afternoon,staring at window, waiting for Priyanka to arrive..with time both of us were really forging a strong friendship.

In class2 we would stay back in school after classes had ended doing up the Class bulletin board or preparing articles..we shared common interests..and we were made prefects and captains alternately.I must admit she was far more responsible than i was.
While I would hone my simian instincts on the yellow painted monkey-ladder or sway on the swing,Priya(shortened her name coz i found Priyanka too long) would take pleasure in combing Aaya Didi's(school's staff) tresses and tell her how lovely they were.Then she would plead to me"Sneha,come down,let us try the see-saw".
We started visiting each other's place more often as we ascended classes;for assignments,class-notes,exhibition work(she made lovely clay balls as planets when we made a model of solar system).I loved the lip-smacking pickles her mom served to me while she kept trying to ride my bicycle.She was outstanding in maths and hindi.
Once she won a local elocution competition,still never let it go into her head.I drew inspiration from her,and won it the next time.
Aahh!!The dramatics and dance that we were into..She was made Sonia Gandhi once,Queen of King Solomon(when King solomon had to bow down and propose to her,both of them were too shy to do it),a dowry demanding mother-in-law..but my favourite one remains the "Mind your Language"skit in class 6 and the falguni pathak dance we taught to the slum children.

We were both choir members and enjoyed singing together.The way she would impersonate one of our teachers in an attempt to sound very much like those high pitched opera singers...that still invites my chuckles.
Gutsy and brave she was,and would stand up against anything she felt was wrong.I remember when in class6.she saw a std.10 captain leaving the tap
at the water point open,with water spewing all over.She went up to him,though she saw he was with his gang,and questioned him"Bhaiya,you left the tap open,is it not your responsibility to close it?"The captain said"Can you see my badge,do you know who i am?"
That didn't budge her to say"You should put forth an example ,so please do close the tap."
Priya was compassionate and would helping out people.One day when one of our classmates was being teased by the rest of class guys,for no fault of his,she took up cudgels on his behalf.The rest of the guys were all put to silence by her words.She later became friends with everyone even that senior captain who would call her"Priyanka madam" in banter.She was a real tomboy and everyone started liking her.
Not that Priya and I never fought.We had plenty of tiffs between us,but very soon we would get over it and laugh at each other's stupidity.
We enjoyed those "girl talks"..I told her how i couldn't stop thinking about Hrithik after the release of KNPH and she confessed even she was nuts about Salman.
Our friendship was getting noticed by everyone.Once our Games teacher gifted us a bouquet(which was gifted to him) saying,"this one,for your friendship girls"

In Std.7 Priya lost one of her three elder brothers,to some undiagnosed illness..The loss was obviously too big for the family,so they were moving to Patna where her father worked,and where most of her relatives stayed.
I was really downcast at this thought of her leaving..I remember giving her a tight hug and a lovely showpiece while parting..she presented me a walkman(she knew how much i needed it).
Though time healed the void,that i had initially felt after she left,as i made new good friends.
But still,class periods were never the same and recess never as amusing as it used to be..
Its not that easy to stop missing one's first friend.
We always were in touch with each other..confiding those teenage secrets over the phone..she was no more the same,as she now had started giving me mature advices.

On 11th May 2 years back,my B'day,she had called me in the morning to wish,her voice was not the usual perky one,probably coz she had just got up from sleep then..and said she'd call me later..I kept waiting for that "later"..
Exactly 2 years back on 23rd May,our 12th results were declared,I kept calling her to share my frustration,as my results weren't as per my expectations..but no one picked it up.Then the other day her Father rang up to break that ill-fated,shocking news"Beta,Priyanka is no more.."
I just couldn't believe what i had heard..Then her eldest brother took away the phone from uncle,as uncle started to sob bitterly.Bhaiya said that she was fine at the dinner last night,only when they tried to wake her up the next day on 23rd,they found her breathless...
I was not in a position to ask any further.I still am not..I tried doing that on her B'day but feared what if one call of mine revokes the grief of the bereaved family.
It took weeks for the feeling to sink in,that I no longer will be able to talk to my adorable friend.
I feel eerie at the thought,how often Priya and I would end our conversation saying to each other"HASO,JIYO,GAAO,MUSKURAAO,KYA PATA KAL HO NAA HO"(laugh,live,sing and smile what if tomorrow never comes)
Today,on her second death anniversary,I just want her family to be blessed with fortitude to get on with their lives,after losing two of their lovely children...
Truly,WHOM GODS LOVE DIE YOUNG.

SMART and I

Sorry folks!! If i havent been in touch with u all these days..Not at all my fault...
Here is something which will make some empathise and others sympathise with me..

How ironical!!they call themselves RELIANCE Smart.None of the 2 adjectives has been true in my case of consumerism..so spare me!!
Ever since i bought my first mobile phone it has been no less than a dream for me to talk without interruptions..never have I had a breakthrough in talking ..
Each time I tried calling someone "NETWORK BUSY" signal would flash on my mobile screen..Shouldn't there be a NETWORK to keep itself BUSY??
At least the signal"ERROR IN CONNECTION" was justified.I agree ...Yeah!!there were plenty of errors in the connection..And when,at all,I made some success in connecting with someone i would heave a momentary sigh of relief,and remark"I cant hear you. sorry can u please be a bit louder??"," Can u please come in a better network area?"
After much of the martial arts i practised near my room's window placing my cellphone in all possible directions..
The best network area that i could access was my hostel lawn..
So i would run out of my room out in the lawn..where I had to battle the cold,rain and many a times mosquitoes' army conspiring a carnage on me.
predicaments of all sorts...but still no hassle free conversation.After a few months I gave up...No point! manoeuvring my mobile and myself in all directions screaming"hello,hello" for the umpteenth time..wasting my cellular balance(pun)..and still not able to hear a word from the other side.

Friends and relatives would complain that i had turned unsociable,rude,cocky..no more bothering to exchange pleasantries over the phone.
One of my frnz scrapped me on orkut "What shrill!!after uve reached colg it seems all your calls are just being directed to one number,what no.is it??
Uve forgotten us..yaar
Wont ask u much coz i know such things do happen...All the best to u two"
GOD!!What on earth did my frnd mean??Nonplussed i was at this false accusation.
Some even asked mom if i was OK(some presumed i was under depression, or given to one of those teenage"identity crisis" fits)
The situation became all the more hopeless when my message tone beeped and hostel frnz next door would ask"So,Shrill what message is it?","Is RELIANCE asking u to download ringtones or asking u to take a look at your horoscope,coz Human beings are hardly in touch with you"
Sorry!!people..i tried my best..rang up the customer care where no one picked up the fone..wrote mails addressed to Smart ppl which they dint received ..
Then came LAN in BIT..all buddies hooked onto it..I dint have my comp in the hostel,so when my frnz were busy confabulating
and making new frnz on LAN..
I was CAST AWAY!!
At times this incommunicado feeling made me feel like a reclusive islander.
Even Robinson Crusoe had Man Friday with him..

But yeah it came with its own advantages too!!
Best part being whenever in class or labs my frnz with some other network provider, would have painstakingly take their
cell out and switch it off,or silent it..Huh!! i would shrug my shoulders in that smug pleasure and say"See,i wont need to do that..no network,no calls"
And as one of my hostel friends Gita(name changed to protect privacy) suggested;the service acts as a call filter...How come??
she explained.."look,when ure getting call from a no..u don't want to attend,just place ur cell somewhere inside your room..no network,no call,
and even if by some quirk of fate
the person contacts u; just go on..saying,hello cant hear u"
Well such a situation never arose in my case...
As of now,I m happy ;meeting all my friends this summer,making up with them,and asking them to read my blog.
LESSON LEARNT:"What LIES in the name?!";-)

2002:A Space Odyssey

A girl when in std.9 always wanted this work of hers to get published in the school magazine...but the magazine didn't come out..and this text got lost,
later she retrieved this work of hers after years.. i thot of publishing it in my blog,...so give it a read please..its about her first hot air balloon flight.

The sky was painted azure,and cottony wisps of cloud dotted it.The green sylvan strands swayed in the air dancing to the tunes of the melodious,fragrant breeze.
The garment that mother nature wore was more than "just favourable" for my first hot air balloon flight.
The authorities at the airport had organised a free hot air balloon flight for students.
As the old saying goes "the early bird catches the worm",i was amongst the first few students who had turned up early in the morning probably
coz i never had the flight experience before ..I was geared up in a helmet and a leather suit(just in case smthin went wrong).
The colour of the balloon was red.It was so; to be distinct in the sobre background.An airport attendant Sheena was there to accompany me.
(She was probably there to check on my nerves and in the next 5 mins. she would become my "messiah" for life!)

"All set", Sheena told her colleague as they tested the hot air engine which emanated blazing red fumes.
In one frantic motion we got into the basket of the balloon and in a trice we were elevating and soaring new heights in the sky.Merely ten metres above I felt I was on cloud#9,but as i scaled new heights my blood thickened,heart thumped,temples pounded and
intestines went haywire...Acrophobia,i guess.I just closed my eyes.
Sheena understood that things werent fine ..Much to my relief she clutched my hand and bolstered me saying"Think ur flying..all by yourself..".
My conscience urged my mortal senses to be brave..

Very surprisingly,my belly turned red from yellow.Yes!I now was transformed from Little Miss Muffet to Joan Of Arc.
On opening my eyes I found a much friendlier Earth under my eyes.At a height of about 200 metres, I enjoyed playing hide and seek with the sun..and the clear pond beneath; served as a clear mirror for it.
There were these lush fields,with meandering brook running through them.I was not wearing my myopia correcting glasses so the aeroplanes below
resembled giant horses unable to trot.The statue of the Maharaja seemed like a frozen truant waiting for his gang members.
The cars moving up and down the street looked like mice scampering about..and the horde of students waiting below looked like ants of different species.
As the 30 mins. of this exhilarating odyssey was coming to an end..I held on to Sheena,thanking her,as we retarded our pace..The gravity pulled us down.
I now wanted to relive each moment of this flight.However when i reached the ground,i was submerged in an overwhelming feeling of reunion with my Mother..
My mother in all sense..my MOTHER"LAND"..

EARTHQUAKE@8.0

"Wake up" ," Get moving"...Mon's shrill voice pierced through my ears,and i darted out of the bed....looked askance through the window and wondered why on earth was Mon
considering to jog so early...It was still dark outside; then I looked at the alarm clock(the same machine you and I set to buzz ..and still want it never to buzz, and when audaciously does so, slam it on! n then again go back to Zzzzzz..)it was only 2.30.a.m!!
Following her was Maggi, whose words shook the ground beneath my feet..she cried out loud"EARTHQUAKE'S GONNA STRIKE..Run,people!!!".
Well,I got carried away...in the fleeting world of cinema..
The Titanic plot where the sailor sees the iceberg and warns" ICEBERG ,RUN AHOY"..flashed across my inward eye..
Then Day After Tomorrow's climatic catastrophe where the scientist warns people about the snowstorm...and asks them to MIGRATE.
Hmmm..but here were we in BIT where earthquake was being forecast..interesting
I did recollect from the project work i did in geography during school a) earthquakes cannot be predicted 2) usually are nocturnal 3)Ranchi lies in the safe belt region
Nevertheless the 2nd clause was true..it was 2.30 night/morning....whatever..
so some scare was justified.
TAKE 1
So,we got the front gate of our hostel opened..and out were we in the cold..under the stars..(rare for gals at BIT).
Each of our hostel inmates was out..some rubbing eyes, some running to get out asap
Frnds advising each other not to stand near electric poles and how to go about doing this ..that..
The Best part being ppl coming out of the hostel with their prized possessions eg.laptops n mobile,GPA cards!!!(not me please)
Fellow Gujju frnz reciting their harrowing anecdotes about the quake that rocked Bhuj...resulting in great number of casualties..and i was left musing..
What if the same happens here too..
Then i appease myself thinkin "Naaa...My horoscope both in HT and TOI predicted the week was gonna be enjoyable..
I could head for a hotel but definitely not a hospital.."
TAKE 2
Waiting outside people had started to play songs on their laptops.."Kal ho naa ho","Armageddon"..and other eerie songs.
I wish I had a Laptop then...I would have preached some optimissim by playing "I M ALIVE(celine)","Brand New Day(Sting)"..
After an hour the scene became more of a picnic than a pandemonium...with people relaxin,and laughing at the stupidity who-so-ever ignited the scare..
I bet you wouldn't believe they were the same ,who were running helter skelter a while ago.
Alas!!Leave alone quake not even a tremor was felt..
"Hoax it was"..told our hostel supdt.
And then I went back to my room , slammed the door ,set the alarm to buzz at 7.30am.

N.B:-By now you must have realised that 8.0 stands for my hostel no. and definitely not richter intensity.

Newton's Ring...

First things First

*This blog of mine has nothing to do with NEWTON though I love apples and am craving for an AppleI-Pod.
*I am no SCIENTOLOGY follower though I had nursed a crush on Tom Cruise.
*I am not engaged as yet, my RING finger is still empty.

Circa November2006.It was a week before the 1st end semester exams of my B.Engg. were to start, and I had been sleeping, drinking, eating, walking and talking only Newton’s ring.(a 2-3 page text in the chapter of Optical physics)
While my other hostel mates were busy delving into other extraneous subjects I was stuck up being fascinated by Newton’s ring.
Friends would ask, "how much is done for exams? ","Hey shrill, what are you studying right now?"
My resounding reply would boom in their ears "Newton’s ring, fellas."
One day a friend took pity on me and said"It shouldn’t take you so long after all its just a 3 page long text,should I help you?"
I simply No-thanked her.
.Now how on earth could I explain my new friends what a procrastinator I am!!
Not that the text needed too many grey cells to be charged,in order to comprehend its meaning.
I was just not getting ahead with it.....uuuuhhhmmmm…..
No, It (read:the text) was not getting ahead with me….probably so because I am a forced believer in the Parkinson’s law….What’s that???..
1)the observation that work always expands to fill the time set aside for it.
2)work will take as much of time as you give it.
If you thought the above meanings were too..euphemistic and obscure..
To be simple
3)not that good at time management.
Alluding to the above explanation..I had been thinking for quite some time to launch my blogsite(ooohhh!!doesn’t it sound oomphy??…...naaaa.….), until I read an article in the newspaper saying how the junta is being smitten by the blog bug,and how people get addicted to it…,how netizens develop an insanity over it…..
I thought …neither do I blog,nor do I get addicted to it and insanity will definitely be at bay(I must add I am a proud Ranchitte and the mental asylum is pretty far from my place.)

Circa December2006.I was getting bugged with life during my semester breaks(trust me too…much of feasting at times leads to burn out…) I started gazing at Blogosphere and after reading some awesome blogs written by an avid blogger...All it did was, rekindled the “I wanna blog too...” instincts in me.
Then I got obsessed with the contents of my inaugural blog,blogsite’s name,blog title and subtitle…
I would spend hours in my balcony thinking about it, thinking about it at the lunch and dinner table,during my siestas…very much like Newton’s Ring.This time Mom would quiz me,"What happened dear,you seem so lost,everything ok??”..
So many blogsite names got coined in my mind…e.g.paradoxical princess, rambling raconteur,clandestine confessions, ….until I went nuts with names as Cercopithecoid(a supposedly intelligent monkey),
and lymphadenopathy(a morbid illness)….
Then a friend suggested “why don’t you go for something simpler?”….
It took a split second for me to come with something as simple as SHRILL VOICES(pun intended)
So here I am …
A NEW KID ON THE BLOG.